THE WAR ON MOUSTACHES HAS BEGUN

[MISTER FART]

WHAT HAPPENS GLWOBELLY IS OF A VERY SERIOUS MATTER, LUCKLILY THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION HAS BEEN SECRETLY WORKING ON A WEAPON THAT IS ABLE TO BE USED ON ONES SELF TO MOUSTACHE THE GENATALIA. IT HAS BEEN A SECRET RECIPE IN THE BUSH FAMILY, PASSED DOWN FROM GENERTAION TO GENERATION AND NOW FOR THE FIRST TIME AVAILABLE TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC. COME ON, LIKE YOU HAVE NEVER WONDERED WHERE THE FUCK THEY GOT THEIR NAME FROM. THE DRUG IS ADMINISTERED BY AN GUNSHOT UP THE ASS, AND WITHIN MINUTES A NATURAL LOOKING BUSH BEGINS TO EMERGE THAT BUSH HIMSELF WOULD BE PROUD OF.

THE PRODUCT IS LIKELY TO BE NAMED "OMG, I MOUSTACHED MY PANTS FOR PEACE"