True Bedroom Stories (Virgins come take notes)

[mburbank]

Back when I was touring in the 80's, I had my one and only casual affair with a very pretty comedian. She was also quite the sexual athlete, but the entire time I kept thinking, 'This certainly looks good, I really ought to be enjoying it more, or at all.'

I stayed the night but woke up about three AM from a horrible nightmare that I was being chased by eight foot tall bugs. I ran into a room and tried to slam the door on them, and managed to, but several twitching bugs legs wedged their way through and were scrabbling around trying to get at me.

I didn't scream when I woke up, but it took some effort.

I suppose this means I'm insane.