Tales From The Crypt: And All Through The House!

[Tony]

Man, I sure miss Tales from the Crypt, Monsters, and Tales from the Darkside. Best eps from all three:
Crypt - Four-Sided Triangle. Patricia Arquette (who was quite sexy back in the day) is a farmhand (more like slave, really) run by a sadistic old couple. She fights off the horny old man's advances while doing her chores and runs to the cornfield, where she meets "her man," a scarecrow. When she explains she's meeting him again at midnight, the old man gets the idea that he'll dress up like the scarecrow and get it on with her. Unfortunately, his wife wakes up, and goes out with a pitchfork. When Mr. Scarecrow goes back onto the post, the ornery old lady stabs it, then cries and mourns her dead, stupid husband. Just then the girl puts the pitchfork right in the mean old lady's back. She actually plotted the whole thing, and takes the key to their vehicle, freeing herself from their clutches.

Tales from the Darkside - The old bayou witch lady (probably best known as Roger's mom on What's Happening) with the voodoo gingerbread men episode really sticks in my mind. She'd also turn people into kitchen rats with magic dough. Ended with the rat (who, as a person, had hidden a gingerbread man)eating the old witch alive. Man, who the heck comes up with this stuff?

Monsters - A comedy episode about a werewolf family (with Jerry Stiller as the Dad!)at odds with their daughter marrying a were-hyena. Fascinating take on racism, and daddy's little girl marrying outside their own.

Post more crypt articles, this was awesome!