Jesus Christ, Destructoid is terrible

[k0k0]

I'm never read it, but am going to guess it goes something like this:

I like breasts. Do you like breasts? Those lumps of fat that hang off a woman that feel kind of like sacks of fish chum and are such a wonder to behold in internet videos. Well I must tell you, video gamers like me love women. I see them every day and when they talk to me, it's like hearing a bird scream in my ear (in a good way). One day a girl was telling me about how she likes to go shopping. Girls love shoes. But they don't like video games. Too bad video games are good and girls are good. I can't choose between them. I think I choose video games.
- Article by Some Guy