Boy, Max, you are obsoletely useless. Why must you bring your complete idiotic ramblings to this board in such as sense to disgrace the name of science? Maybe if you stopped wearing your dad's ass as a hat, you would see what an ass you are making of your self. You ignoramous.
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Gas and masturbation are highly unlikely to be connected with each other. Have you tried to stop masturbating? Has the gas subsided as a result? Perhaps you could try the same experiment by increasing the times you masturbate daily. Do you notice that the gas is increasing?