Being a magnet for insane people....

[imported_I, fuzzbot.]

I always get the bum on the subway next to me telling me about God's sister or something. I dunno much about that hip chick but I hear she brushes her hair with an eggbeater. OMG PPL!

My sister always sits next to this weird old Australian lady, and, before I begin spare the "Wtf? Just coz ahm Austraylion doesn't make me weyard" ok? It wasn't the fact she was Australian that made her mad, nope, it was her demeanour.

She stumbles into the train station to come home. She sits on a bench and a sweet looking old lady props down next her. Like all old ladies, she smells of Yardley Lavender and English Rose, "awwww" she think, before a gust of wind makes her shiver. She turns her head to my sister, smiles, and then says in a delicately sacharine voice "I'm not surprised you're so cold" she elevates her voice "you've got no underwear on"

She retorts "But I am wearing some, honest!" but alas, she just can't get her voice as high as the old lady's. Damn those old grannys and their pervert ways.