* I NOW PRESENT UNCLE_SHAMS HUMUNGUS, BIG ASS CHRISTMAS STORY OF SUSPENCE AND MYSTERY!!!*
as told mostly by my cat
brought to you by Gas-ex "if you have gas.... just fart i guess."
i awoke one morning to the sound of my cat in a fit
i roused in a daze, i glared at the cat sprawled on the floor directing me to the door
i followed her down the hall,
and down the stairs
where she directed me to my secret santa present that she saved from the outside cold of a Canadian winter
after much tearing and shredding of wrapping, a plethora of objects appeared before
my very eyes
a dvd of suspence and mystery
a growing shark of suspence and mystery
a strange tightly wrapped parcel of suspence and mystery
a mystical note
magical trading cards
Suspicious goggles of win and awesome
the movie shall give me and my cat somethign to do when were not playing with our legos
if the shark does grow to such a size i shall harpoon it and place it above my fireplace.
i note awaited my eyes after a vicious ripping of the parcel
i know now is the time
a condom for sexy parties, to prevent the AIDS
my cat decided that the tampon was good enough to eat
i hope you can read this note. i cant im illiterate
she took no intest in the cards
the goggles look good on me
and the cat
and the movie
I hope you enjoyed my fucking long story
thank you and good night
BTW: in 10 hrs ill post how big that shark is