Fun with AIM and strangers :)

[Helm]

Daphne's has been the best so far :robot

[CaptainBubba]

I think its a three way tie between Milhouse backwards, Jixby's first one, and Daphne's.

[Helm]

Yeah but you're a fag.

[Jixby Phillips]

Daphne's is the best

UNTILL NOW

jixbyphillips: A:DLSGJ:DFJSD
VIOLNT CHILD: SFHSH SHLKJSOPHK SFJ;OSJ
jixbyphillips: ESOTEOSIEHGO:SHGSD
VIOLNT CHILD: dgjdgjfdkdgm
jixbyphillips: A:LKATHJEIEOO*W$$ES
VIOLNT CHILD: srh sdfh/dm h;kd dgh;dg;jznk
dg;kljjnk
VIOLNT CHILD: d gj'lkfh'jl fh
VIOLNT CHILD: who is this?
jixbyphillips: EEWO!
jixbyphillips: :SOTHIES:OTA:LSDHCLIE
VIOLNT CHILD: jsgjjnfg jjk
VIOLNT CHILD: fgj hj;
VIOLNT CHILD: WHO IS THISS?
jixbyphillips: :OATIEOESSQWE
VIOLNT CHILD: bye
VIOLNT CHILD signed off at 2:26:10 PM.

[Esuohlim]

I talked to her, and she asked me who i was, then I said I was the actual prince of darkness (LIKE SATAN OR OZZY OSBOURNE ), and she said "IDLE MESSAGE: GONE SWIMMING"

[CaptainBubba]

VIOLNT CHILD IS MINE SONS AND BITCHES.

[whoreable]

CutieGirl55612: hey my names liza im 21/f/latina click here for my pics
GazeboStealer: Hi there!
GazeboStealer: Hello?
GazeboStealer: Knock Knock!
GazeboStealer: Anybody home?
GazeboStealer: You sound cute.

[Anonymous]

Chatychik101 signed on at 9:52:59 PM.
Chatychik101: BUT YOU ARE NOT HOTTER THAN THE ROCK, OR KURT
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, I so am.
Chatychik101: NOOOOOOOO
Chatychik101: YOU
Chatychik101: ARE
Chatychik101: NOT
Chatychik101: OK
Chatychik101: DO YOU KNOW BRIAN MARTELO OR SOMETHIN
Dazzle Luminaire: NOT okay. I am sooo much hotter than the rock + kurt, it would make your fourth grade head spin.
Dazzle Luminaire: No, never heard of him.
Chatychik101: EXCUSE
Chatychik101: ME
Dazzle Luminaire: hahahaha
Chatychik101: NOT 4TH GRADE HON
Chatychik101: YOU BEST BE TRIPPN
Dazzle Luminaire: Why not? DId you get held back?
Chatychik101: HELLLL NO
Chatychik101: 6TH
Dazzle Luminaire: WHOA! You're an old woman!
Chatychik101: LOL
Dazzle Luminaire: Well, that makes you like... TEN now, huh?
Chatychik101: OK?
Chatychik101: 11
Dazzle Luminaire: hahahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: aaaahahahaha
Chatychik101: AND I DO HAVE A BOYFRIEND THAT IS HOTTER THAN YOU
Chatychik101: I THINK
Chatychik101: BUT NOT AS HOTT AS kURT
Chatychik101: OR THE ROCK
Dazzle Luminaire: No, he's probably not as hot as me. Especially if he still enjoys barney tapes, like most children your age.
Chatychik101: NO I DON'T THINK SOO
Chatychik101: LOL
Chatychik101: WHAT ARE YOPU KIDDEN ME
Dazzle Luminaire: Besides, at ten, his "wee-wee" is probably the size of a house cat's.
Chatychik101: 12
Chatychik101: O YOU MEAN MY BOY
Dazzle Luminaire: aaahahaha
Chatychik101: 14
Chatychik101: TAKE THAT
Chatychik101: 14
Dazzle Luminaire: Man! He's really old, TOO!
Chatychik101: HA HAAAA
Chatychik101: YEP
Chatychik101: OH RIGHT AND HE ENJOYS BARNEY ME ASS
Chatychik101: LOL
Dazzle Luminaire: Fourteen... Yeah, that's about the right time that he'll start being able to survive one of my olympic slams.
Dazzle Luminaire: But not two. Never two.
Chatychik101: I COULD RIGHT NOW
Dazzle Luminaire: Hey, little girl; it's time for bed. Your dad says so.
Chatychik101: AND HE'S PROBABLY STONGER THAN YOU!
Dazzle Luminaire: We'll see
Chatychik101: OH I FORGOT
Chatychik101: NOT
Chatychik101: WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE
Dazzle Luminaire: James
Dazzle Luminaire: The Japanese student in Beloit College
Dazzle Luminaire: The greatest person in the entire world.
Chatychik101: TRYING TO TELL ME WHAT MY DAd says
Dazzle Luminaire: He does say that you have to go to bed.
Chatychik101: i get to stay up when i won't
Dazzle Luminaire: haaahahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: You're going to get a spanking
Chatychik101: haha my $##@
Chatychik101: shut the hell up
Dazzle Luminaire: Do girls have $###@s?
Dazzle Luminaire: Craig says... "It's time for bed."
Chatychik101: YOU KNOW WHAT EMILY LOVER YOU DON'T NOW ME AND WHEN YOU DO I'LL MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING HELL
Chatychik101: CRAIG????
Dazzle Luminaire: lol!
Dazzle Luminaire: hahahahahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: You are a really great kid
Dazzle Luminaire: Never lose your sense of humor, okay?
Chatychik101: TA
Chatychik101: EXCUSE ME
Dazzle Luminaire: Yes?
Chatychik101: WHAT SENCE OF HUMORE
Dazzle Luminaire: lol
Dazzle Luminaire: Well, you're making me laugh so much...
Chatychik101: * HUMOR
Dazzle Luminaire: I just hope you don't stop
Chatychik101: i wasn't kiddin
Chatychik101: some but not all
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, I know you werern't.... hahaha
Chatychik101: hahahaha very funy
Chatychik101: as laura types it!
Dazzle Luminaire: So, how are you going to make my life hell?
Chatychik101: O YOU'LL SEEE
Dazzle Luminaire: Uh-oh!!!
Dazzle Luminaire: Goodness, I'm terrified of barney's number one fan.
Chatychik101: WOW DID I SCARE YOU LITTLE PETER
Chatychik101: WHO'S BARNEY??????
Dazzle Luminaire: Yes! I'm afraid of you and your pre-teen sex stud!
Chatychik101: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU TALKIN BOUT
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha
Chatychik101: GO TO HELL
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, Carly... You are great.
Chatychik101: YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A CLUE WHAT YOU Sayin hardon boy
Dazzle Luminaire: I have you tell you, this is some of the most fun I have had in a while
Chatychik101: not here
Chatychik101: laura laughs
Chatychik101: laura said she'll see you in her sex dreams
Dazzle Luminaire: So, what kind of grades are you getting in elementary school?
Chatychik101: better than ytou now
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: Think about it, Carly. How scary can an eleven year old girl really be? I mean come on.
Chatychik101: what the hell is wrong with you
Chatychik101: well you'll see
Dazzle Luminaire: That's what's wrong with me.
Chatychik101: trust me
Dazzle Luminaire: brr!
Chatychik101: you just wait
Dazzle Luminaire: That's me shivering in terror
Chatychik101: i can kill you with my bare hands
Dazzle Luminaire: An eleven year old girl... hahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: haaaaahahahahaha
Dazzle Luminaire: Your bare hands!!!
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha
Chatychik101: got a problom with a girl
Chatychik101: get a life
Dazzle Luminaire: Okay, little one.
Chatychik101: you know i'll kill you if i get to you
Dazzle Luminaire: Are you going beddy-bye?
Dazzle Luminaire: Oooh, that's gonna keep me up at night
Dazzle Luminaire: Do you want my address?
Chatychik101: you're really starting to scare me
Chatychik101: helllllll no
Dazzle Luminaire: Well, you can come and kill me, that way
Chatychik101: well maybe to kill oyu
Dazzle Luminaire: Right
Chatychik101: you*
Dazzle Luminaire: I understood
Chatychik101: and does your Mommy"" says this crap you
Chatychik101: when you're late for bed???
Dazzle Luminaire: So, after you try to choke me or whatever, and then I dislocate your spine, due to an olympic slam, what will you do?
Chatychik101: you need to go and study
Dazzle Luminaire: Actually, I'm going to college in a different time zone.
Dazzle Luminaire: So it's earlier, here.
Chatychik101: like I care
Chatychik101: you can't hurt me
Chatychik101: trust me you'll be dead by that time
Chatychik101: oooooooooooo trust me
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, shit! I guess I'm fucked!
Dazzle Luminaire: hahahahaha
Chatychik101: oooooo
Chatychik101: i no ones having sex wit you
Dazzle Luminaire: You want to have sex with me?
Dazzle Luminaire: That's disgusting. You're only eight!
Chatychik101: fuck you jerk
Dazzle Luminaire: hahahaha
Chatychik101: loose the ego
Chatychik101: no one wants to
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, I see.
Chatychik101: the only way for you is to rape some-one
Dazzle Luminaire: Eek!
Dazzle Luminaire: I hope you're not projecting.
Dazzle Luminaire: Do you know what projecting means, Carly?
Chatychik101: fuck you
Chatychik101: dick head
Dazzle Luminaire: Was it one of your spelling words?
Chatychik101: i'm am going to kill
you
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, dick head! Man, she's going right for the ones that she KNOWS will hurt me!
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, shit! I'm going to get killed by an elementary schooler! haaahahahaha
Chatychik101: you don't even have one so i don't know why i'm saying this shit to you
Chatychik101: sorry bout that
Chatychik101: GIRL-FRIEND
Dazzle Luminaire: Neither do I. Maybe you need to go relearn your times table.
Chatychik101: !!!
Chatychik101: O DARN
Chatychik101: YPOU CAUGHT ME
Chatychik101: YOU
Dazzle Luminaire: Caught you in your elementary school prime?
Chatychik101: TIME
Chatychik101: TO
Chatychik101: BURN
Chatychik101: IN
Chatychik101: HELL
Dazzle Luminaire: Time to go to bed, before you get punished?
Chatychik101: !!!!
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha
Chatychik101: BASTERD
Dazzle Luminaire: lol!
Dazzle Luminaire: You're so small...
Chatychik101: NEVER MIND
Chatychik101: OOPS
Dazzle Luminaire: I think I could take you more seriously if you learned to spell.
Dazzle Luminaire: If I got you a dictionary, would you use it?
Chatychik101: LISTEN FREE WILL GET ON STUDYIN SO YOU CAN LEARN HOW TO SPELL
Dazzle Luminaire: Free Will? What the hell is that?
Dazzle Luminaire: Are you trying to tell me you're a will smith fan?
Dazzle Luminaire: What a dork.
Chatychik101: mRS. gHETTO FABULOUS
Chatychik101: FREE WILLY GET IT???
Dazzle Luminaire: No, I actually don't.
Chatychik101: WHAT ARE YOU NOW A 1 YEAR OLD
Dazzle Luminaire: What are you now, ten?
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, wait...
Dazzle Luminaire: haaaahahahaha
Chatychik101: WE ARE GIRLS AND WE KNOW WHAT IT IS (LAURA AND i)
Chatychik101: MR. GHETTO FAB.
Dazzle Luminaire: Are you trying to speak ebonics?
Chatychik101: MMM HMMMM
Chatychik101: THATS RIGHT
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh, okay.
Chatychik101: WE MAY BE WIGHT BUT WE CAN SPEAK BLACK
Dazzle Luminaire: Wight?
Chatychik101: GOT DAT
Dazzle Luminaire: You may be retarded, but at least you can't type.
Chatychik101: WONNA BET
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha.... Oh, god... This is great!
Dazzle Luminaire: I guess so, "wight" girl!
Chatychik101: FREE WILL, LITTLE PETER, COME ON LITTLE RICHARD
Chatychik101: YOU GOT DAT
Dazzle Luminaire: Little Richard? What are you ON?
Dazzle Luminaire: Little Richard is a rock star.
Chatychik101: O AND HON IT'S WHITE
Chatychik101: GOT DAT
Chatychik101: SISTER
Dazzle Luminaire: Then why did you spell it "wight"?
Chatychik101: SISTA
Dazzle Luminaire: Do you talk like this in real life?
Chatychik101: LAURA ASKED VOULA VOOCO SHAY OVECMO SAY SWAY
Chatychik101: OR WHAT EVEA
Dazzle Luminaire: Nice spelling
Dazzle Luminaire: Maybe when you're in middle school, you can take a french class
Chatychik101: LOSER LOSER DOUBLE LOSER WHAT-EVER WITH A TWIST WHIPE A TEAR BLOW A KISS MAYBE YOU AIN'T WORTH ALL DIS, TALK TO THE WRIST CAZ YOU GUS BEEN DISSTED
Dazzle Luminaire: What is that, a nursery rhyme?
Chatychik101: MMM HMM
Chatychik101: YOU BE YA
Dazzle Luminaire: Do you sing that when you're playing "double-dutch" with the other children in your class?
Chatychik101: O YES
Dazzle Luminaire: hahaha
Chatychik101: YOU KNOW ME
Dazzle Luminaire: Sing me another song, Carly
Chatychik101: WELL SORRY I DON'T TAKE FRENCH BUT AT LEAST I CAN SAY IT AND KNOW WHAT IT MEANS
Dazzle Luminaire: Oh yeah? What does it mean.
Dazzle Luminaire: You don't know.
Dazzle Luminaire: Because you're in fourth grade.
Chatychik101: IF YOU WONNA GO and get killed smoke and l in da back of the bezy o why do i leave this soon hey must be the money
Dazzle Luminaire: What's a bezy?
Chatychik101: benzy
Dazzle Luminaire: Benzy?
Dazzle Luminaire: Did you misspell that?
Chatychik101: if you don't know what that is you just stupid
Dazzle Luminaire: I only ask, because you misspelled most of the other words, too
Chatychik101: i like big butts and i can not liue, you otta da brothers can't deny
Dazzle Luminaire: So, do you listen to a lot of rap in your elementary school?
Chatychik101: lol
Chatychik101: gpt that
Chatychik101: almost all
Dazzle Luminaire: I bet you do. How fat are you?
Chatychik101: misspelled
Chatychik101: not fat at all
Dazzle Luminaire: Fat like a grape?
Chatychik101: why are you talkin weight?
Dazzle Luminaire: Why are you talkin' ebonics?
Chatychik101: who got you in dat, you moda
Dazzle Luminaire: Yeah, me moda
Dazzle Luminaire: yo
Chatychik101: you can not speak ebonics can you
Dazzle Luminaire: whaxusgup in ta hud yo
Chatychik101: laura say you need to take a course
Dazzle Luminaire: yo i m carly
Chatychik101: i love jap.
Dazzle Luminaire: Sou desu ka?
Chatychik101: you still can't speak it
Dazzle Luminaire: Nihon-go o hanashimasu ka.
Chatychik101: not jap. sucks
Dazzle Luminaire: Ee, ii desu ne...
Chatychik101: we need to close our inagration gartes
Chatychik101: im*
Dazzle Luminaire: Tafun anata wa inu kara desu...
Dazzle Luminaire: inagration gartes?
Dazzle Luminaire: What the hell does that mean?
Chatychik101: i have to go to a party ok talk to lAURA LATER
Dazzle Luminaire: Yeah, right
Chatychik101: OK
Dazzle Luminaire: You're going to bed
Chatychik101: WONNA BET
Dazzle Luminaire: Before you get spanked
Dazzle Luminaire: Yes, I do
Chatychik101: GIMME YOU ADDRESS I'LL PASS IT ON THE WAY
Dazzle Luminaire: Like eight year olds are allowed out this late on school nights...
Chatychik101: THE CAR IS A BENZ
Chatychik101: M. BENZ
Chatychik101: WHITE
Chatychik101: GOT IT BYE
Dazzle Luminaire: 700 college street
Beloit, WI 53511
Dazzle Luminaire: Goodnight, little girl!
Chatychik101: OK BYE
Dazzle Luminaire: Have fun being eight!
Dazzle Luminaire: Come and visit!
Chatychik101: 14
Chatychik101 signed off at 10:30:38 PM.

[agroskaterik]

i was toothpastebreath

ToothpasteBreath: hello
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: who r u?
ToothpasteBreath: who are you?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: um...im brittany
ToothpasteBreath: are you sure about that?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: um...yes...who r u?
ToothpasteBreath: what did you eat for lunch today?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: i didnt eat lunch today
ToothpasteBreath: oh, are you one of those anorecksick types?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: no...i love food...i dont understand how people can be anorexic...who r u!!?
ToothpasteBreath: do you know where i am
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: if i dont know who u are i wouldnt know where u are...
ToothpasteBreath: ...do you like popsicles?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: who the fuck r u
ToothpasteBreath: i have lots of popsicles.
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: stop trying to change the subject...
ToothpasteBreath: what was the origional subject?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: um..who r u!
ToothpasteBreath: is that any concern of yours?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: yes...
ToothpasteBreath: how many toes do you have?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: ok...well...bye
ToothpasteBreath: wait
ToothpasteBreath: i'm sorry
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: yes?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: ok...who r u?
ToothpasteBreath: Arthur
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: um...ok?
ToothpasteBreath: hello brittany
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: and...should i know you?
ToothpasteBreath: you should.
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: how?
ToothpasteBreath: i follow you a whole lot.
ToothpasteBreath: a whole lot.
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: um...whats ur last name?
ToothpasteBreath: Fonzarelli
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: funny...
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: rob?
ToothpasteBreath: what?
ToothpasteBreath: rob?
ToothpasteBreath: who is rob?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: ok u r not the fucking fonz...
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: bye
ToothpasteBreath: goodbye

(2 minutes pass)

NvREmOTiOnLeSS: ok why dont u just stop being a fuckhead and tell me who u r...
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: apparently u know me...so...just let it out..no biggy
ToothpasteBreath: goodbye
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: fuck you
ToothpasteBreath: why
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: bcuz ur an asshole
ToothpasteBreath: but i love you
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: really...
ToothpasteBreath: do you like parks?
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: il answer if u tell me ur name
ToothpasteBreath: why are names important
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: bcuz..then ill know who u fucken are!
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: cuz...u probably know my last name too right?
ToothpasteBreath: probably
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: ok..what is it..
ToothpasteBreath: its on my list somewhere
NvREmOTiOnLeSS: omg...ok u fucken stalker...why dont u either...say ur name...or fuck off ok?
ToothpasteBreath: cya

[CaptainBubba]

I keep getting ones that play along damnit.

But this one started out ok. (Cory was a name in her profile)

dscoM0nkie: Omg you can tell cory he can get his dick sucked by you from now on. I'm not speaking to him. you tell him its OVER next time u see him. This is Emily btw
TwiztidKitten187: umm?
TwiztidKitten187: what's going on
TwiztidKitten187: im confused
dscoM0nkie: ya, this is Emily, yunno, from school? ya, cory can forget about it. I won't do that shit he wants. I dont care if its legal now.
TwiztidKitten187: i don't live by cory or go to his school
TwiztidKitten187: i just met this kid like a couple weeks agi
TwiztidKitten187: *ago
dscoM0nkie: well next time you see him tell him
TwiztidKitten187: umm ok?
TwiztidKitten187: can i ask u a
TwiztidKitten187: ?
dscoM0nkie: And could you please for the love of god tell him to stop putting on womens clothes and peeing on my lawn ornaments?
dscoM0nkie: what?
TwiztidKitten187: whut
TwiztidKitten187: now im confused as hell how did u get my sn
dscoM0nkie: what did you want to ask?
dscoM0nkie: he gave it to me.
TwiztidKitten187: when
TwiztidKitten187: and why
dscoM0nkie: earlier today. but who gives a shit. that doesnt matter. I want my clown costume back. he said he only wanted to borrow it .
TwiztidKitten187: i don't know u and i havent sucked his dick or nething .....so i don't know why ur so mad ...
dscoM0nkie: Um, honey, ya i did, and it was a mistake.
dscoM0nkie: Now, onto other things. When are me and you gonna go see a movie?>
TwiztidKitten187: whut
dscoM0nkie: I was thinkin Id pick you up at about 3:00 A.M and wed go to a movie then I'd suffocate myself with a leather bag
dscoM0nkie: maybe cory could come and give me my stuff back
TwiztidKitten187: so how do u know me?......and why would u want to suffocate urself
dscoM0nkie: what is your name btw? Or if you want you could make up a secret alias
dscoM0nkie: I like suffocating. Its my thing. Now come up with a nickname, or your real name
TwiztidKitten187: Nala
TwiztidKitten187: ur emily
dscoM0nkie: Omg that is so low. I can't beleive you would give yourself the name of my aborted child
dscoM0nkie: that is sick
dscoM0nkie: so a movie at 3:00?

Then she started playing along.

[Mike]

myke362: How's it goin squirt?
sportgoddess21: WTF
myke362: THZ
sportgoddess21: that doesn't mean a thing
myke362: so sure?
sportgoddess21: yeah i fucken know all dat shit
sportgoddess21: this isn't who you think it is, i'm usin her computer
sportgoddess21: I'm 22/f/collegechick
myke362: KFC
sportgoddess21: shut up. cyber
myke362: right
sportgoddess21: ok
myke362: what are you into?
sportgoddess21: in the kitchen
myke362: oh, then you must like to cook
sportgoddess21: I wanna cook you baby
myke362: I wanna chop your onions all night long, you tender little chicken breast
sportgoddess21: I am now taking off my pantyhose
myke362: I am now preheating the oven
sportgoddess21: I am dragging my tongue down your chest.
myke362: I am chopping celery vigorously!!!
sportgoddess21: WTF I said in the kitchen not wit all da kichen stuf and sich
myke362: you don't like my chopping?
myke362: is my knife not big enough for you?
sportgoddess21: you know this is not at all like real fucking
myke362: well your supposed to jack off at the same time.
sportgoddess21: how?
myke362: OMG you are 22 and you've never masturbated?
sportgoddess21: yes, and no
myke362: as a man of experience, I'll be your guide
sportgoddess21: ok
myke362: see the mouse on the desk? it goes in the vagina
sportgoddess21: no way, that's not my mouse.
myke362: frankly I don't think the mouse gives a damn. give the mouse some lovin babe
sportgoddess21: fuck you jerk, you don't noe anything
myke362: hey! you'll hurt the mouse's feelings!
sportgoddess21: ur retarded, buster.
myke362: oh now I'm hurt, you called me "buster", don't do that again cuz I might be offended or something
sportgoddess21: you mock me, o vile scum boy
myke362: what the hell, is this the same broad?
sportgoddess21: don't call me a broad, pervert.
myke362: why? cuz you might get offended? I don't want to do that. uh oh..
sportgoddess: eat shit and piss yourself, you twizzler
myke362: Mwahahahahaha :]

[starz]

1st attempt


Session Start (AIM - St4rZ123:hotbab4u2k): Sat Jul 12 00:30:27 2003
St4rZ123: GREETINGS
hotbab4u2k: hello
St4rZ123: HOW ARE YOU
hotbab4u2k: good u
St4rZ123: FINE DO U KNOW WHO THIS IS?
hotbab4u2k: nope who
St4rZ123: OMG LOL ITS JOE
hotbab4u2k: joe who?
St4rZ123: HOW DO U TURN CAPS OFF?
hotbab4u2k: on the side where it says cap lock
hotbab4u2k: joe who
St4rZ123: SILLY I CANT TELL U THAT OVER THE INTARNET SOME WEIRD GUY WILL COME STALK ME AT MY HOUSE
St4rZ123: O
St4rZ123: ok
St4rZ123: ill CALL U K
St4rZ123: WE GO TO SCHOOL TOGETHER
hotbab4u2k: aww...
hotbab4u2k: iam in WI u cant call me
St4rZ123: WHY NOT
St4rZ123: U DONT HAVE A CELLUAR PHONE?
St4rZ123:
St4rZ123:
St4rZ123:
hotbab4u2k: not with me
hotbab4u2k: JOE WHO please jsut tell me
St4rZ123: WHY ARE YOU IN WI
St4rZ123: SUMMMER TRIP
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: YOU BROUGHT YOUR COMPUTER WITH YOU TO WI?
hotbab4u2k: no
hotbab4u2k: iam on my sisters computyer
hotbab4u2k: JOE WHO please tell me
St4rZ123: ILL TELL U SOON BUT I DONT TRUST THE INTRANET
hotbab4u2k: its okay
hotbab4u2k: pleas tell me
St4rZ123: YOU SURE NO1 WILL STALK ME?
St4rZ123: AND KILL ME WHEN THEY FIND OUT WHO I AM
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: ?
St4rZ123: CAUSE
St4rZ123: THEYLL KNOW MY LAST
St4rZ123: NAME
hotbab4u2k: yeah Iam sure
hotbab4u2k: see Ashley Weeks thats me
St4rZ123: HOW DO U KNOW?
St4rZ123: OMG SOME1 WILL STALK U
St4rZ123: I WOULD HIDE IF I WERE YOU
hotbab4u2k: no they wont lol
St4rZ123: HOW DO U KNOW?
hotbab4u2k: please tell me who ya are
St4rZ123: JK THIS IS ROB OMG LOL
St4rZ123: JOE IS WITH ME
St4rZ123: SORRY HE IS DUMB
hotbab4u2k: Rob who?
hotbab4u2k: iam so lost
St4rZ123: WHY ARE U LOST
St4rZ123: U DONT KNOW ME
St4rZ123: WE SIT BEHIND U IN ENGLISH
St4rZ123: JEEZ!
St4rZ123: I*
hotbab4u2k: i dont know do u
St4rZ123: YES
St4rZ123: I ASKED U ON A DATE BUT U SAID NO (((((
hotbab4u2k: i know a Robert not a ROb
hotbab4u2k: i have never been asked out
St4rZ123: YES U HAVE
St4rZ123: U DONT REMEMBER
St4rZ123: U SAID NO TO ME
St4rZ123: I CRIED
hotbab4u2k: what school do u go to
St4rZ123: U SURE I CAN TRUST THE INTRANET?
hotbab4u2k: yeah
St4rZ123: HOW DO U KNOW
St4rZ123: ARE U SURE
hotbab4u2k: yeah
St4rZ123: HOW!!!!
St4rZ123: I WAS STALKED 1CE
St4rZ123: BY SOME GUY NAMED JIXBY ONLINE
St4rZ123: HE CAME TO MY HOUSE AND HURT ME
St4rZ123: GOOD THING I DIALED 911 LOL HE'S IN JAIL
hotbab4u2k: umm okay
St4rZ123: DO U LIKE ME?
St4rZ123: ROBERT
St4rZ123: IS ME
hotbab4u2k: For real tho Tell me ur real name and what school u go to
St4rZ123: I AM ROBERT
hotbab4u2k: Robert who
St4rZ123: SHH
St4rZ123: JIXBY IS LISTENING
St4rZ123: I KNOW
St4rZ123: I G2G <3 TALK TO YOU ANOTHER TIME
St4rZ123: OK
St4rZ123: !!!
Session Close (hotbab4u2k): Sat Jul 12 00:40:50 2003

[Jeanette X]

Originally Posted by Mike

sportgoddess21: in the kitchen
myke362: oh, then you must like to cook
sportgoddess21: I wanna cook you baby
myke362: I wanna chop your onions all night long, you tender little chicken breast
sportgoddess21: I am now taking off my pantyhose
myke362: I am now preheating the oven
sportgoddess21: I am dragging my tongue down your chest.
myke362: I am chopping celery vigorously!!!
sportgoddess21: WTF I said in the kitchen not wit all da kichen stuf and sich
myke362: you don't like my chopping?
myke362: is my knife not big enough for you?

That was hilarious!

[Esuohlim]

ENetuohnav: One
CheerChick10813: what?
ENetuohnav: Two
CheerChick10813: who is this??
ENetuohnav: Three
CheerChick10813: what r u donig????
ENetuohnav: Four
CheerChick10813: *doing
ENetuohnav: Five
CheerChick10813: do i know you?
ENetuohnav: Six
CheerChick10813: y r u counting??
ENetuohnav: Seven
CheerChick10813: eihgt
ENetuohnav: Eight
CheerChick10813: nine
ENetuohnav: Ten
CheerChick10813: elevne
ENetuohnav: Eleven
CheerChick10813: ten
ENetuohnav: Twelve
CheerChick10813: wtf r u doing?
ENetuohnav: Thirteen
CheerChick10813: stop talking 2 me
ENetuohnav: Fourteen
CheerChick10813: y r u doing this??
ENetuohnav: Fifteen
CheerChick10813: shut up!!!!!!!
ENetuohnav: Sixteen
CheerChick10813: stfu!!!
ENetuohnav: Seventeen
CheerChick10813: what the hell? who r u??
ENetuohnav: Eighteen
CheerChick10813: thats it im leaving
ENetuohnav: Ninteen
CheerChick10813: im singing off
ENetuohnav: Twenty
CheerChick10813: bye
ENetuohnav: Twenty-One
CheerChick10813: im seroius shut up
ENetuohnav: Twenty-Two
CheerChick10813: fuk u goodby
ENetuohnav: Twenty-Three
CheerChick10813: i hope u fuking die
ENetuohnav: Before you go, I'd just like to point on that I was trying to get into the Guinness Book of World Records.
ENetuohnav: I was going to break the record for "Most Consecutive Numbers Counted in an AOL Instant Message". The record is 9,000,001.
ENetuohnav: And you ruined it for both of us. You could have been in the Guinness Book of World Records for years to come. You could have been famous. You could have been a legend if you had just helped me out.
CheerChick10813: oh
CheerChick10813: sory
ENetuohnav: Yeah, you should be.
CheerChick10813: you can keep goning if you want.
ENetuohnav: No, it's too late. Forget it. I'll find someone else who isn't a total cunt about it.
CheerChick10813: sry
ENetuohnav: Just shut up. Do you know how upset this makes me?
CheerChick10813: no
ENetuohnav: You wouldn't understand. You're a brainless fuckwit of a cheerleader.
CheerChick10813: stfu, i'm going. i don't even know u. fuk u and fuk ur wolrd record thing.
ENetuohnav: ...Do you want to cyber?

Then she signed off.

[MLE]

at Esuohlim

[Rongi]

Originally Posted by CaptainBubba

dscoM0nkie: And could you please for the love of god tell him to stop putting on womens clothes and peeing on my lawn ornaments?
dscoM0nkie: what?

[Jixby Phillips]

Milhouse backwards you are fantastic at these.

[Anonymous]

This isn't nearly as funny as Milhouses', but it just happened. It's between me and an old history teacher of mine. He needs to take some deep breaths :<

Popndeth: dee dee dee dee dee-dee-dee-dee-dee
Kerouac200: where are you in college?
Popndeth: i'm in the not-in-college wing :<
Kerouac200: why not?
Popndeth: um, dunno :>
Popndeth: i don't like school much :<
Kerouac200: did you drop out of college or not go?
Popndeth: not go :>
Kerouac200: I'm at jhu
Kerouac200: Love it
Popndeth: teaching, i assume
Kerouac200: student
Popndeth: really? why?
Kerouac200: I want more degrees
Kerouac200: Ilove school
Popndeth: :<
Popndeth: you hurt more than your back in that skydiving drop :<
Kerouac200: I love to learn
Kerouac200: I've been a successful student
Popndeth: i bet you're going to apply that knowledge in all sorts of useful ways, too :>
Popndeth: maybe you'll build the biggest snow-cone machine ever
Kerouac200: yup
Kerouac200: useful is relative
Popndeth: and leave your mark on this society for generations to come :<
Popndeth: i'm sorry, i just don't find unapplicable knowledge useful or worth learning :<
Popndeth: that's my main problem with school
Kerouac200: I work on literacy programs for underachieving schools
Popndeth: if i did go back to school, it'd be for specific classes
Kerouac200: good for you
Kerouac200: make yourself happy
Popndeth: i can't tell if that's sarcasm :<
Kerouac200: I don't tend to deal in such with people who hate school
Kerouac200: just be happy and work hard at something
Popndeth: i want to dj and make music and do live stuff :>
Popndeth: i lost fifty pounds after i left school :>
Kerouac200: did you drop out of h.s.?
Popndeth: no, but i really should have :<
Popndeth: well, probably should have.
Kerouac200: you should have
Popndeth: haha
Popndeth: no, i barely graduated from friends last year
Kerouac200: you wasted a space a kid who wanted to learn might have filled
Popndeth: oh snap :<
Popndeth: is all this tonality because of my snow cone comment :<
Kerouac200: Did you ask to be sent to a Baltimore City public school?
Popndeth: haha, no. county public school was bad enough.
Kerouac200: what snow cone comment?
Popndeth: it's up there somewhere :<
Kerouac200: why go to a good school if you didn't care anyway?
Popndeth: just because i don't care about learning doesn't mean that i didn't have to fill a perceived requirement
Popndeth: so i might as well do it at a nice place
Popndeth: where i didn't have to dodge clotheslines and enter bullet time upon entering the cafeteria
Kerouac200: that's sad
Kerouac200: I've enjoyed JHU
Popndeth: i think it's sad that you aren't dancing on weekends and learning to glowstick :<
Popndeth: but i don't beat you up over it :<
Popndeth: my friend that got his ged went to goucher and jhu
Kerouac200: I'll be done with one degree soon and on to another
Kerouac200: black belt test on the 19th
Popndeth: he said that he liked goucher a lot better than that jhu had a crappy foreign language program
Popndeth: he's also studying brazilian ju-jitsu in college, now
Kerouac200: great
Kerouac200: I miss college
Popndeth: you remind me of that guy in monkey island 2 that draws maps all day
Popndeth: and you can steal his monocle
Kerouac200: I love grad school
Popndeth: i just don't understand it :<
Kerouac200: whatever that means
Kerouac200: I always enjoyed school and I missed it while away
Popndeth: i think it means a graduate school
Kerouac200: what don't you like about it? What's Monkey Island?
Popndeth: where did you go?
Popndeth: i jus said; i don't like learning stuff i don't want to know
Popndeth: and i prefer to learn at my own pace
Kerouac200: oh right
Popndeth: so courses would be the next-best-thing
Kerouac200: frankly, you couldn't beat me up over not wanting to learn to glow stick and dance
Popndeth: it's a saying, kung-fu master
Kerouac200: You couldn't because I don't care
Kerouac200: I'm off to finish a paper.
Popndeth: well, technically, i could, but you 'wouldn't care' about me doing it
Popndeth: have some fun while you're out being professor jones :<
Popndeth: and searching for the fate of atlantis :<
Kerouac200: thus, there would be no impact, ergo no "beating up"
Kerouac200: I have tons of fun
Popndeth: i can tell :<
Kerouac200: "fun" is relative
Kerouac200: this paper is fun
Popndeth: i like the sort of fun that makes me happy
Popndeth: personally.
Kerouac200: my martial arts are fun
Kerouac200: my marriage is fun
Popndeth: i guess it all depends on what your definition of 'is' is
Kerouac200: my life makes me happy
Kerouac200 signed off at 9:24:59 PM.

looking over it again, that last line of his makes me lol :<

[Rongi]

[CaptainBubba]

Milhouse backwards is the best.

Also heres an exerpt from another failed conversation:

VagisalDeLifeSvr: great
VagisalDeLifeSvr: now whered you get my screen name
dscoM0nkie: Iforgot. :'(------ i have leprocy..
VagisalDeLifeSvr: got it from buddypic... i looked you up.. i am smarter then the average... toe you know
dscoM0nkie: i'll suck your dick for a cheeseburger. :'(

[soundtest]

@ milhouse and @ Chojin's views on education

I searched Google for a screenshot from the episode of Simpsons (where Lisa was dating Nelson) of Milhouse jumping up in the air choking his dog with the leash saying "YES!" after Lisa said her next crush "could be anybody" ... but I couldn't find it.

[Anonymous]

hooray! I've removed my autoblocker. now ANYONE can IM me until I once again realize why it isn't a good idea!

[The Retro Kat]

God, Mike, who the fuck calls people twizzlers?

[Esuohlim]

The chick that was talking to Mike did. LIKE, DUH!

[The Retro Kat]

W3RDD.