Someone explain strip clubs to me pls.

[Kitsa]

Tadao's pagebrak pic reminded me.

Ok, you go to the strip club. In exchange for small bills, moderately attractive women (or sometimes not at all attractive women) who may or may not be putting themselves through college, who may or may not have any number of diseases, pretend that they find you irresistible. I get that part.

So you get your boner and...what? You can't do anything with it, you're not allowed to touch them unless it's one of those places. So you just sit there aroused through a succession of women? What's the point? If you go out with a group of guys, you just end up with a group of horny guys. Unless you're into gay group sex, that doesn't sound like much of a plan.

Does everyone discreetly vanish for a few minutes to "relieve" themselves afterward? Does that get awkward? Tell me, because I really don't know. I've never been to one.

I'm mainly talking about guys here. I know women go to strip clubs but that gets complicated.

[MetalMilitia]

Men generally like looking at women in varying levels of undress even if there is no promise of sex afterwards. It's like how on those old adverts for Diet Coke the scantily clad builder would get in a elevator with a bunch of women and they were all like "woah a/s/l?!". I'm sure none of the women in that advert had to go and "relieve" themselves afterwards and it's the same for men. It's just nice to get drunk and look at tits every so often.

[Pub Lover]

I like tits, they set me off.

[Sacks]

I'm pretty sure a lot of guys go to strip clubs because it makes them feel manly and bad ass being able to throw some money at a woman and have her all over you making you feel desired. Some other guys like it because it's a total 'guy thing' and you can be obnoxious while getting totally bro with your friends. It's like going to the bar on Easy mode. No approaching women or buying them drinks to get them to talk to you and make you feel cool. You just throw money at a girl's ass and let her do all the work. Pub and MM are right too, the majority of guys also just like looking at tits.

[Dimnos]

Free internet port > Strip club

[Dimnos]

And the beer is cheaper too.

[Guitar Woman]

I realized a few nights ago that I can legally go to strip clubs now, but they're probably really lame and filled with slutty spic strippers and perverts.

I don't do well in places like this!

[Kitsa]

Well, a relative of mine used to frequent them (and perhaps still might, dunno) and the strippers would have trading cards. Like, seriously, collect 'em all.

[Guitar Woman]

Venerealmon

GOTTA CATCH EM ALL

[Dixie]

I used to work at one.
I was a waitress but I'd hang out with the dancers and we'd all laugh at the people that would come in.
We had nicknames for the regular clients that were only spoken in the dressing room.

[Evil Robot]

Where I live, people go to the strip club "Teasers" to buy cocaine.

[Tadao]

I had friends addicted to them, I've only been twice. The first time was entertaining because I was with a group of people (guys and gals) getting hammering. The second was with a friend that went all the time and that was just weird creepy.

[Esuohlim]

I'm the faggiest straight guy you'll ever know, and because of this I am inherently unable to recognize the appeal of strip clubs whatsoever. Hope this helps

[Zomboid]

LOL LOOK AT THIS FAG

I've been to a few strip bars, and it is fun to get drunk and watch vag and tits dance around the stage, but everything's usually overpriced. One time I got to spray girls with a water gun for the wet t-shirt contest though. That was pretty special.

[Big McLargehuge]

i used to head down to Nogales Mexico when i was younger to do some underage drinking. If you found the right guy he would charge you 2 dollars to get into a strip club where they will give you free booze till they realize you aren't going to give the strippers any money :/

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Gotta go to the ones in Canada though, 'Merican strippies just aren't the same. I'm lucky enough where they're just over the border. Once in a blue moon me and the guys will go out. It's just fun to go out, socialize, drink and oh yeah, strippers.

This one girl came out to Hungry Like the Wolf by Duran Duran. It was awesome. I talked to her afterword and she said she was going to come out to Iron Fist by Motorhead next week but I didn't bother going back.

[Mockery]

I've never been in a strip club and have no desire to ever change that.

Originally Posted by Kitsa

Well, a relative of mine used to frequent them (and perhaps still might, dunno) and the strippers would have trading cards. Like, seriously, collect 'em all.

Yeah, if you walk the street in Vegas, there are guys handing out cards for all kinds of strippers and call girls. When we went there in 2006, I think we managed to collect the entire set, including all the rookie cards.


http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/vegas06

[Tadao]

If I was to ever go back to a strip club, I would want it to be in Vegas.

[Kitsa]

My dad brought some like those home from Taiwan. He said hookers leave them in the phone booths.

He had one Lost in Translation style experience there. A big company was putting him up at one of the bigger hotels, and he kept getting these calls. A breathy woman kept asking if he was Ron Ree. Since my dad's first name is, indeed, Ron, he thought that was some guy's name (my dad's kind of an oblivious nerd) and told her she had the wrong number, and hung up.

Several times she called back, asking for Ron Ree. Eventually someone from the hotel called his room and helped "translate" for the streetwalker, who was at the front desk waiting to be invited up, that she was asking if he was ROAN-ree.

Apparently the hotel had a deal with local prostitutes and would give out the room numbers of Western businessmen traveling alone.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

For some it's also like a rite of passage amongst men. We went this one time to Canada and their was a bachelor party seated next to us. A large group of men dressed mainly in business-casual attire. Except for the man of honor who had a Star Wars: Empire Strikes Back T-Shirt. He made my top ten list of heroes for that year.

[Sam]

In that picture Mockery posted one of the girls in the top left corner looks like she is 12.

I went to a strip club with my friend and his cousin. The cousin paid around $200 dollars to go in the back room with the stripper. He basically paid $200 for the worst case of blue balls he had ever had.

[Zomboid]

There's this one really small strip bar that's in the "resort town" that my friends and I pass through on our way to houseboating every summer, and last year about 20 of us piled in and just got plastered. It was pretty fun and the posters that she handed out (if you managed to land a dollar on her snapper) looked like they were printed off of one of those apple printers from the early 90s.

The first time we went, we passed some visiting hell's angels on the street and told them where the bar was. One of them snorted and said, "let's go shit on her!"

[WhiteRat]

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman

I realized a few nights ago that I can legally go to strip clubs now, but they're probably really lame and filled with slutty spic strippers and perverts.

I don't do well in places like this!

You probably don't do well in any situation involving women.

[Tadao]

Not true. He would do just fine if they were 12 year old Asians.

[WhiteRat]

Strip clubs are great to go to every once in a while to socialize with your friends, keep a buzz going, and to see hot chicks naked. I don't see anything macho about it at all.

Anyone who goes to a strip club to hook up with one of the girls or goes to try to get their rocks off is probably a sad lonely man.