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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 12:16 PM        Not exactly a "romantic" relationship question,more a people-in-your-life question...
Is there a point where you are just completely willing to write someone out of your life? If so, how far do they have to push you? Does it have to be a big betrayal? A long history of using you or taking you for granted? Some broken promises? Just generally treating you like shit?

I try to be pretty easygoing but I've got a couple of candidates on the horizon and I'm thinking about it.

I'm not talking about hating someone, I'm talking about "Have a nice life, fucker, I never want to see or hear from you again." So far there are only a couple of individuals who have had the privilege, but life is short and people are shit.
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 12:24 PM       
Are you talking about people in your life in general? Or people you have been involved with? If you are talking people in general... If they are just annoying or a dumb ass I try to avoid them. If its someone you are involved with... As soon as you break up with them I never want to see them again.
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 12:34 PM       
Just in general. If I break up with someone that's it, they might as well be jettisoned into space.
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 12:36 PM       
honestly, i do that alot. usually with me it's the 3 months rule of thumb -- if idon't talk to someone for more than 3 months, then i don't need to stay friends with them. i clean out the phone address book quarterly if you want to be friends, lets be friends. don't just say it and make me keep your IM name and phone number in my contacts so that you can not talk to me.

other than that, when people suck, i just stop talking to them. i never felt the need for any dramatic "fuck you, get out of my life" (though there have been times that would have been fun and appropriate), usually people will get the hint and leave me alone if i stop returning calls, IMS and emails.

on the other hand, sometimes i don't return messages for weeks at a time. oops.
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 01:10 PM       
I have a bit of lenience but sometimes you just get so fucking sick of looking at people that constantly lie to you, bullshit talk around you etc.

I just wrote someone out the other day to be honest, a friend and old room-mate of years. Fuck him.
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 03:40 PM       
I GOT NO ROOM IN MY LIFE FOR A TRAITOR
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Old Aug 10th, 2009, 09:07 PM       
I'm of no help here. Much to my wife's chagrin, my ex's almost universally insist on remaining friends, and in all honesty, our breakups (save one or two) weren't really acrimonious. My wife gets intensely mad about it because I do have a lot of friends, exs included, but then I constantly have to reassure her, "If I wanted to be with them, what sense does it make to marry you?"
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 02:24 AM       
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I'm not talking about hating someone, I'm talking about "Have a nice life, fucker, I never want to see or hear from you again."
Yeah, 2 really old friends.
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 08:47 AM       
I have one. He was a good friend, but he turned into a real bastard. I'm going to his house this week to pick up my games and probably never speak to him again.

He's a two-faced bastard, but he's like that with everyone, so at least he's consistent.
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 10:09 AM       
What did he do?
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 10:16 AM       
THAT'S AN AWFULLY PERSONAL QUESTION
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 10:32 AM       
That makes this an awfully personal thread!
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 11:45 AM       
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Originally Posted by michael corleone
[Fredo], you're nothing to me now... You're not a brother. You're not a friend. I don't want to know you or what you do... I don't want to see you at the hotels. I don't want you near my house... When you see our mother, I want to know a day in advance so I won't be there... You understand?
Give him this speech, verbatim. He'll get it.

EDIT: It would help if you were Sicilian, though.
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 04:00 PM       
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What did he do?
He talks shit behind people behind their back and he's very hostile. I tried getting through to him, thinking that something's been bothering him, but I realized that this is just his personality. He's an asshole, always has been, but he's been getting nasty as of late. So fuck him. I don't want a friend like that.
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 08:22 PM       
I'm sorry Fathom, I will be a better friend to you in the future.
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Old Aug 11th, 2009, 09:29 PM       
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He talks shit behind people behind their back and he's very hostile.
I used to know someone like that. I thought he respected my work, then I found out he was talking smack behind my back. Sayonara, baby - don't let the doorknob hit you in the ass on the way out.

Funny thing is, he tried to ask for my help on a problem he was having at work. I basically told him to work it the f*** out.
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Old Aug 12th, 2009, 03:08 AM       
I know. My soon-to-not be friend does just as much. He takes friendships for granted. He's afraid of being alone, but he just alienates everybody. I can't change that, and he doesn't want to. So we're done. It's that simple.
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Old Aug 12th, 2009, 08:09 PM       
Punch him in the cock.
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Fathom Zero Fathom Zero is offline
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Old Aug 12th, 2009, 08:10 PM       
No, to hurt him the worst would be to let go of him, so that's what I'm going to do.
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Old Aug 12th, 2009, 08:15 PM       
If you love something, let it go.
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Old Aug 16th, 2009, 08:29 PM       
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If you love something, let it go.
And if you hate something, let it go... and hope to God it doesn't come back.
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Old Aug 19th, 2009, 09:52 PM       
My problem with this is that for a friendship to deteriorate to such an extent that you might tell someone you never want to see them again you must be going to quite a lot of trouble to maintain the façade that you still like them.

Why don't you just register your irritation with people whenever they irritate you and save yourself the drama?
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Fathom Zero Fathom Zero is offline
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Old Aug 20th, 2009, 01:10 AM       
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My problem with this is that for a friendship to deteriorate to such an extent that you might tell someone you never want to see them again you must be going to quite a lot of trouble to maintain the façade that you still like them.

Why don't you just register your irritation with people whenever they irritate you and save yourself the drama?
We used to be good friends. The only reason why we are still friends is because we were friends. But, I told me mate goodbye and that was that. Phone calls from 'im are going to go unanswered from this point forth.
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Old Aug 20th, 2009, 01:33 AM       
I guess that would depend on your gut feelings.

I personally have pretty far limits on keeping friends. Thus far, there's only been one person who I was friends with and dropped. This happened after she told some very blatent lies to me (that she was a famous model, a Russian child actress, was in a full-blown production of Les Miserables as Gavroche, had to smuggle jewelry when she left Russian to come to America, got a 100% on her SATs, was accepted to Harvard, decided to go to Pitt instead but was given total free admission, room, and board, etc), basically stalked and harrassed my brother until he was totally freaked out, caused all this trouble insisting that no one ever talked about her behind her back, and seemed to be moving in on my boyfriend.

I never actually told her to get out though as I saw her rarely after I graduated.
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 20th, 2009, 03:22 PM       
I remember being in high school with a girl with whom I'd been fairly friendly up to that point. We were bored in a class, and she made some sort of little cartoon about a dog and passed it back to me. I made another cartoon about the dog and passed it back to her.

Then the note-passing stopped abruptly and she ran out of class as soon as the bell rang. A couple of days later she hurled this long, ridiculous, 4 page handwritten letter at me. It was all about how the dog-cartoon was HER thing and how DARE I draw the dog also and she would never be able to trust me again blah blah blah. It was weird, overblown, overdramatic overkill. I still have it somewhere.

My reaction to this, mentally, was "wtf, crazy bitch alert" and I wrote her out of my life right then and there. Didn't say anything to her, didn't go out of my way not to speak to her, just didn't ever deal with her again. Until facebook, when a bunch of other people I was only marginally on speaking terms with found me and "suggested" her as a friend. Fuck that.

That's what I don't like about facebook. If I didn't like them then, what makes them think I'd like them now?

Last edited by Kitsa : Aug 21st, 2009 at 08:47 AM.
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