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mburbank mburbank is offline
The Moxie Nerve Food Tonic
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 01:11 PM        I'm psychic, or, THREAT LEVEL NEON CARROT
Okay, this is from the first draft of my play for the science Museum on Risk Analysis:

"Fears about how afraid to be rose today as a new National Alert system based on the Crayola Big Box was introduced, raising the current Vivid Tangerine threat level to Sunset Orange. Asked to describe the threat level, spokespeople advised the public things were more serious than Neon Carrot, but not as threatening as Red Orange. "

and this is something I just pulled off CNN five minutes ago:

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- U.S. government officials are discussing the current five-color terror threat alert system to determine whether a higher level of risk should be added before a possible war with Iraq, government sources tell CNN.

The debate is not over whether to add a new color, sources said. Instead, a slightly higher warning level may be added within orange.
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Protoclown Protoclown is offline
The Goddamned Batman
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 01:15 PM       
"It's like I'm livin' in a stinkin' poop rainbow." - Cordelia Burbank
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sspadowsky sspadowsky is offline
Will chop you good.
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 01:24 PM       
Freaky coincidence. Just this morning, I was thinking that a good skit would be a gay interior decorator type guy criticizing the tastelessness of the color selection for the alert system.
Child Zoloft

Last edited by sspadowsky : Apr 18th, 2011 at 06:33 AM.
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FS FS is offline
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 03:41 PM       
I bet they're going to change the names of the color levels once people don't get scared as easily anymore. Then it'll range from "FLAILING BLACK DEATH DYNAMO" to "ABSOLUTELY BLOODY DARK SCARLET".

And everytime it's raised, a tall black guy with a megaphone will run through the streets screaming its name at the top of his lungs.
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kellychaos kellychaos is offline
Join Date: Feb 2003
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 03:49 PM       
I think that Rumsfeld should make a TV appearance on my show. We could display several swatches and the viewers could all vote for their favorites via the internet.


Wherever you go, there you are.
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FS FS is offline
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 03:58 PM       
Or maybe streetlights all over the US should be replaced with extremely powerful laser cannons that fire retina-incinerating rays colored like the current alarm level into the face of any pedestrian that passes by.

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Skulhedface Skulhedface is offline
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Old Mar 18th, 2003, 04:18 PM       
Then of course, the people who are out on the street corners preaching End Of Times will start going berzerk when a kid shines a laser pointer in his eye.
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