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  #226  
Sam Sam is offline
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Old Apr 2nd, 2010, 02:04 AM       
AND THEN MY FRIEND BRIAN JOINED THE PARTY LIKE RIGHT AFTER, IT WAS ALMOST A FIVESOME
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  #227  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Apr 2nd, 2010, 08:58 AM       
:GROUPAIRHORN
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  #228  
kahljorn kahljorn is offline
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Old Apr 2nd, 2010, 03:32 PM       
:O :O
you guys is sluts
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  #229  
bigtimecow bigtimecow is offline
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Old Apr 9th, 2010, 07:24 PM       
decided to pull a tony v (this ridiculous asian kid in my major; engrish all around) and whilst eating vagina, asked "did you came?"
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  #230  
Dimnos Dimnos is offline
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Old Apr 10th, 2010, 02:12 AM       
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"did you came?"

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  #231  
MarioRPG MarioRPG is offline
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Old Apr 18th, 2010, 06:49 PM       
Couple summers ago at a party I had my then-girlfriend on my lap sitting side ways. We had been making out and stuff and then I casually slipped my hand up her shorts to finger her a bit. She was hosting this party you see, and we were both pretty drunk. So she's clearly enjoying it and we kept at it for a while. Then my one friend (the only sober person) runs up to us. I go to jerk my arm away instinctively but she grabs it and sorta turns towards me to make it not so obvious.
So basically I'm knuckle deep in this girl and my friend sorta stutters "uh... I need to get my bike out of the garage, can you unlock the door (host)?" So I respond "Yeah, thanks she'll get to it in a sec" and I proceed to shoot him a thumbs up with my ah, wet hand, completely ruining any chance of subtlety.
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU PUNY LITTLE BASTARD. I DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO MAKE A MAN OUT OF YA, OBVIOUSLY, BUT COME BY ANY TIME AND I'LL WHIP YOUR SUPPLE LITTLE GIRL BODY INTO A SHAPE

LOVE, YOUR FIJIAN HOST DAD
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  #232  
Zhukov Zhukov is offline
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Old Apr 19th, 2010, 05:05 AM       
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  #233  
kahljorn kahljorn is offline
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Old Apr 28th, 2010, 09:34 PM       
probably not the appropriate thread but it was jus tSTRANGE the other day i went to the store downstairsand there was this chick in there and she was all, "HELLO MY NAME IS ANDR0MEDA" and she had a voice like a lisping gay dude (haha ok not that bad) and she was all, "I SAW YOU TENDING TO THE flOwerS ONE TIME, IT MUSTVE BEEN BACK IN JANUARY" and i aws all, "YEP" and then she was all, "I HEARD THAT YOU WERE MARRIED... SHE MUST BE VERY PRETTy"

i thought people only said things like that in movies
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  #234  
Phoenix Gamma Phoenix Gamma is offline
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Old Apr 28th, 2010, 09:41 PM       
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Originally Posted by bigtimecow View Post
decided to pull a tony v (this ridiculous asian kid in my major; engrish all around) and whilst eating vagina, asked "did you came?"
...did you really?

Dammit, you keep using all of my lines before me
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  #235  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Apr 29th, 2010, 10:45 AM       
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Originally Posted by kahljorn View Post
probably not the appropriate thread but it was jus tSTRANGE the other day i went to the store downstairsand there was this chick in there and she was all, "HELLO MY NAME IS ANDR0MEDA" and she had a voice like a lisping gay dude (haha ok not that bad) and she was all, "I SAW YOU TENDING TO THE flOwerS ONE TIME, IT MUSTVE BEEN BACK IN JANUARY" and i aws all, "YEP" and then she was all, "I HEARD THAT YOU WERE MARRIED... SHE MUST BE VERY PRETTy"

i thought people only said things like that in movies

Maybe she thinks she is trapped in a movie. You should have cut her a real.
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  #236  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old May 4th, 2010, 07:16 PM       
Finally got anal. ickle

Had to sign a reverse deal though.
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  #237  
Babs Babs is offline
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Old May 10th, 2010, 01:28 AM       
WAY TO GO BILL! Someone finally popped your brown cherry. Did you leave them a snickers bars or an almond joy?
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  #238  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old May 21st, 2010, 01:47 PM       
I've really wanted to fuck exactly two girls from school. Last night, I got the second one (I did the other one a while ago).

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  #239  
Chojin Chojin is offline
was never good
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Old May 21st, 2010, 05:51 PM       
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  #240  
MarioRPG MarioRPG is offline
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Old May 23rd, 2010, 03:39 PM       
Way to achieve your goals, Zomboid!
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Originally Posted by Esuohlim View Post
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU PUNY LITTLE BASTARD. I DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO MAKE A MAN OUT OF YA, OBVIOUSLY, BUT COME BY ANY TIME AND I'LL WHIP YOUR SUPPLE LITTLE GIRL BODY INTO A SHAPE

LOVE, YOUR FIJIAN HOST DAD
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  #241  
bigtimecow bigtimecow is offline
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Old May 25th, 2010, 02:41 PM       
basically, if she's on her period we just have anal sex for a week

and it's fantastic
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Bigtimecow you are like the Fonz of girls pussies.
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  #242  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old May 25th, 2010, 06:01 PM       
;highfive btc.

We were doing anal the other day and it felt like I came with my entire body for a minute straight, convulsed and then collapsed.
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  #243  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old May 25th, 2010, 06:02 PM       
Edit: double
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Last edited by 10,000 Volt Ghost : May 25th, 2010 at 07:09 PM.
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  #244  
LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old May 30th, 2010, 01:04 PM       
When I read that story, I pictured the guy in your avatar. I'mma go drink some bleach.
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You are what they call a deficient human being
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  #245  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jun 1st, 2010, 06:44 PM       
Today she was like "we can't fool around tonight because I have a gynocologist appointment tomorrow."

So I'm like "but you don't have an orthodontist appointment tomorrow."
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  #247  
Sam Sam is offline
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Old Jun 2nd, 2010, 01:20 AM       
OR THE PODIATRIST
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  #248  
Fathom Zero Fathom Zero is offline
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Old Jun 2nd, 2010, 01:26 AM       
Or the pediatrician.

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  #250  
LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Jun 9th, 2010, 12:54 AM       
I'm probably really late on this, but I just found out you can get glow in the dark condoms. :O
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