Features

mburbank · #1

I think Reagan is already dead. Patti Davis gave a story to the press about the gipper being totally incapacitated. Theres a news story today about a group pushing to get his face on the dime. These are prepping measures.

My only question? When will his death be announced for maximum political benefit?

Will it be

A.) During the Republican convention

or

B.) During the Democratic convention?

I'm going with B. It will totally blunt if not erase convention coverage, it will make praising Reagan almost obligatory for the Dems during their speeches, and it will make anyone who doesn't sing his praises, even those who only don't mention him look churlish and unpatriotic. And THEN the republicans can use him on top of that. Imagine a W. commercial with a looming, transparent Reagan kisser superimposed over a fluttering flag with W in the foregorudn talking about the Axis of Evil.

If he really isn't already dead, the temptation to bump him off or hide him and announce he's dead is going to be almost irresistable. Karl Rove must be actively praying if he isn't actively plotting.

The One and Only... · #2

I don't think Reagan is dead yet. I just think he will "unexpectantly" die during the Democratic National Convention.

mburbank · #3

So you think they will bump the poor old vegative bastard off, or just say they have?

Protoclown · #4

These are interesting ideas, Max, and somewhat scary. If it turns out you're right I'm going to be freaked the fuck out.

The One and Only... · #5

Quote:

Originally Posted by mburbank

So you think they will bump the poor old vegative bastard off, or just say they have?

Depends on who they can find to examine the body.

The_Rorschach · #6

Its is a sad thing that the Democratic Party-goers adhere so strongly to Clinton.

It is even worse, however, that Republicans cling so tightly to Reagan.

Nearing the close of 1893 this country was considering weighty topics revolving around bimetallism and Platt's plan to unify New York against the will of the general populace. In 2003 our stooly President is concerned with plastic turkies and photo-ops.

Rather than giving speeches during their respective Conventions, politicians ought to be giving euologies this year.

kellychaos · #7

Methinks that they're going to speed up the timetalbe for redeployment from Iraq to coincide with the passing of the Gipper thus marking in the American minds the glory of the newly created "Republican Day" holiday to remind us all of the various accomplishments of the party.

mburbank · #8

They can get whoever was the chief physician to the Reagan during his presidency to examine the body. He had no problem keeping Reagan's Alzheimers from the nation, why would he scruple to lie about the exact timing or nature of his death?

Miss Modular · #9

Quote:

Originally Posted by mburbank

These are prepping measures.

I spotted another one on TV. They're running Family Ties all weekend on TV Land. Family Ties was believed to be Reagan's favorite show (during his presidency, anyway).

camacazio · #10

The current political administration's news coverage grip has been to strong for it's duration. I'm sick of political parties. We should have listened to George Washington and avoided them altogether.

ziggytrix · #11

the republicans and democrats are to political parties what mcdonald's and walmart are to corporations.

Suck 'n' Fuck · #12

The CIA is sucking people's brains out through their assholes! They stick a vacuum tube in yous asshole, then they turn on the suction, and then, wham! Your brain gets sucked out where the sun doesn't shine and then you become a vegetable. Not a vegetable that grows on a plant, but the kind that stares at the wall and drools. Only the Zionist Jews are being spared. All hail Cthulu.

mburbank · #13

Why, what a clever user name!

Suck 'n' Fuck · #14

Cleverer than sucking people's brains out through their asshole.

kellychaos · #15

The republicans fluffers are currently at work behind the scenes in preparation to reveal the largest cock ever in November.

Suck 'n' Fuck · #16

And whose cock would that be?

kellychaos · #17

The same one that's been screwing you for over three years.

Suck 'n' Fuck · #18

My thumb doesn't have a cock, dipshit.

Miss Modular · #19

DON'T FUCKING SWEAR

Suck 'n' Fuck · #20

Don't motherfucking swear, goddamnit!

ranxer · #21

s&f where did you get this brain sucking story?
do you have a personal experience with this practice?

if you made it up.. well, lol, i am disturbed by what kids come up with these days.

if you did make it up what do you think are your influences for such an idea? do you listen to rush limbaugh, sean hannity or oh'riely?

they seem to have bizaare reasoning based on nothing rolled into a pill that americans are swallowing every day.

Suck 'n' Fuck · #22

I wrote down "CIA" in the middle of a piece of paper, because all conspiracy theories involve the CIA. Then, I wrote down other random thing and drew arrows connecting them and shit like that. Then I magically transformed my flowchart into a paragraph about the CIA sucking people's brains out of their assholes.

OK, I didn't really do that.

The secret is experimenting with various mind-altering drugs, especially psychedelic drugs, and watching a lot of Sienfeld.