Things you know now you wish you could tell your younger self.

[MetalMilitia]

- YOU'RE GONNA QUIT SMOKING POT IN A FEW YEARS ANYWAY SO DON'T EVEN BOTHER STARTING

Tell my past self that one too. What a fucking waste of 4 years.

[Kitsa]

That's good to know, because I never did drugs and always wondered if I'd missed out.

[Colonel Flagg]

- Relax a little; don't be such an uptight prick all the freaking time.
- Apply to more than 2 colleges (idiot)
- The exchange student wants you - go for her, and stay away from the freshman (she's insane)
- Do the God Damned reading, you son of a bitch.
- You're here to learn, not to order out and play cards.

That just about covers it.

[Asila]

That's good to know, because I never did drugs and always wondered if I'd missed out.

You know, I did the pot thing once and was glad that I did, so at least I could say that I knew what it was like

[Matt Harty]

Wear condoms idiot.

[Pentegarn]

There are a ton for me.

"Don't drink that beer, and the several thousand others you will subsequently drink. They will only make your gut fat"
"Debt sucks, 75% of the shit you think you need you will ultimately regret ever buying because you will not use it in the end (I am looking at you XM radio)"
"Long distance relationships do not work. And when you get a chance to find that out firsthand, save yourself time and just walk away from that."
"Trust your instincts about your classmates, don't give them the benefit of the doubt ever."
"Get into the fire safety and security business as soon as you can. Don't waste your time working for Limited Brands, they have NO loyalty to their employees and no real business sense."
"Caffeine is HIGHLY addictive. Whatever you do do NOT try Code Red Mt. Dew"

[Esuohlim]

Originally Posted by Matt Harty

Wear condoms idiot.

HI MATT "THE PARTY" HARTY

[Fat_Hippo]

"Don't eat that blue lollipop, it'll make your shit green."

"Stop being such a pussy; punch more people in the face when they won't fucking listen." Oh wait, I should still do that.

"Don't enroll in that fucking school, who cares if you can go to university or not. You don't know what you wanna do anyway, and it'll just increase the amount of time you waste travelling back and forth from school from 10 minutes to 1 and a half hours per day. It's not worth it, and you don't need to learn latin anyway."

[T-Rex]

Don't get a Facebook account.

Be more responsible with your money.

Just because the hot girl in the shop told you her birthday doesn't mean you should get her something you fucktard. You live in a small town. You're fucked everytime you see her, even years from now. Seriously past me, you made things awkward for future me and he really doesn't appreciate your shit.

[Seven Force]

oh god it finally happened

GBS has come to I-Mockery

[StalfrosGR]

Just because she will play Warcraft with you doesn't mean it is true love.

[WhiteRat]

Originally Posted by Seven Force

oh god it finally happened

GBS has come to I-Mockery

I see the threadshitting from GBS is here as well.

[McClain]

1) You shouldn't have put your penis in there.
2) Why didn't you bang that chick?
3) Buy stock in Apple.
4) Why didn't you bang that chick?
5) Why did you bang that chick?
6) Enjoy being hairless. It won't last.
7) Until you're 22, nothing you do means a damn thing.
8) Try out Japan.
9) CLOSED-BETA! DO IT!
10) Fuck writing for I-Mockery. Write for National Lampoon!

[The One and Only...]

Never trust people on buses.

[Fat_Hippo]

"Don't pet that siamese cat for the next 2 hours. You don't know it yet, but you're allergic, and if you pet that cat, it will make the next 2 days of your life painful as shit, so don't do it. Seriously."

"Play outside more, so I...you...we don't have so many allergies later on. Stop playing with clay, drawing stickmen and playing pc games! There's a wonderful sandbox outside; USE IT! That way, maybe I won't have all these fuck-...you're 4, aren't you? Anway, just do it, so I don't have to suffer."

"You were totally right in jabbing that pencil in your brothers back. Totally. You may have doubts now, but ten years later, you'll realize that it was SO worth it. So don't hesitate, and jab away."

[liquidstatik]

- DO BETTER IN SCHOOL
- STOP SKIPPING SCHOOL 'CAUSE YOU JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE IT
- DON'T STOP DRAWING, YOU'LL REGRET IT LATER WHEN YOU SUCK AGAIN
- STOP BEING FRIENDS WITH EVERY GIRL, THAT JUST MAKES DUDES THINK YOU'RE A FAGGOT AND GET NO SEX
- GET A GOD DAMN JOB (I'M LOOKING AT YOU TOO, CURRENT SELF)

[Grislygus]

Originally Posted by The One and Only...

Never trust people on buses.

RAPE

[Seven Force]

Originally Posted by The One and Only...

Never trust people on buses.

i remember that...

[Fat_Hippo]

Originally Posted by liquidstatik

- GET A GOD DAMN JOB (I'M LOOKING AT YOU TOO, CURRENT SELF)

This explains how you can be here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

[Emu]

Originally Posted by Seven Force

oh god it finally happened

GBS has come to I-Mockery

Actually IIRC this post predates the one in GBS.

[MadballChibcha]

Thing I´d say to my younger self:

Ask for another highschool. A co-ed one preferably.

[Esuohlim]

Originally Posted by T-Rex

Don't get a Facebook account.

Are you kidding Facebook helped me get laid

[Sethomas]

Man, I really love to bring up social networking sites from a sociological standpoint as far as how they're going to destroy us more likely than make us stronger, but then I consider how much effect FB has had in my sexual (mis)adventures and I'm torn.

[JediScum]

Work on more upper body strength.

Hitchhike to Chicago so you can see Big Black before they break up.

Learn Greek, Arabic and Sanskrit alphabets.

Never watch "Nacho Libre".

Oh, yeah, pack some pillows and blankets in that shitty car you have. Drive more girls around instead of those dipshit guys who never give you gas money.

Take gymnastics.

Keep skating.

[Dread Naught]

1-The pretty young blonde in 2nd grade is more trouble than she's worth.
2-Next time you hit a kid in the nose, make sure it does more than make it bleed for two weeks.
3-Don't listen to your heart, it will lead you away from what you need to do.
4-Sue those bastards.
5-Believe in yourself and trust no one.
6-Don't go after girls wearing glasses.