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  #1  
zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 08:45 PM        Oh my God
Seeing as this has to do with my dick I thought it should be in loveline. If Im wrong then sue me. But here goes

So Im behind G building at school with my friends doing some extreme walking. My friend Corey comes by and Im gonna mess with him. I tell him to come here and he does. I squirrel tap him to say hello. At this point for me I moved in a really wierd position so I got my pubes stuck in my zipper. Corey didnt like getting hit in the nuts and responds with a "Hey Austin!" and kicks my cock. MY HAIR IS RIPPED OUT. I scream because it hurts so fucking bad. The bell rings and I go to my classes. I ignore the pain and it eventually goes away. Fast forward to this morning. I roll over to my stomach after I wake up and flich with pain. Im thinkin "what the fuck??". I undo my boxers look down and notice I was wrong about yesterday. It wasnt hair... It was SKIN. I now have a cut on my cock. Now I walk funnier than I did before. Holy shit ow. Its painful if I shift the wrong way. Its been like this all day. Great. Hopw you guys are laughing at me now
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 08:47 PM       
Split-dick
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MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:03 PM       
You could try some of that spray on bandage stuff.

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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:05 PM       
Ill try to get some. I think "Cut cock" should be my title under my screenname.
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MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:05 PM       
YOU DONT GET ONE

PS I have no idea what spray on bandage is actually for. It just seemed like a better idea than a regular bandage.
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:07 PM       
negative attention is better than none at all, eh, zelda?
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:09 PM       
HELP GUYS

I BROKE MY PENIS
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:11 PM       
I've had a huge rip on the head of my dong from getting too much soap on it in the past. Hurt like hell and bled like crazy. Even with stopping jerking off, it would open from my boxers chafing. It was unpleasant, all in all.
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:11 PM       
Fuck you fatty. Its only slightly cut and it still works. I cant have sex or get head though so that sucks. And least I can find my wang without having to suck in and move my belly (You deserved every fucking bit of that so dont get all bitchy you touchy prick).
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:13 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeldasbiggestfan
It only slightly works and it's still cut
FIXED
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Gurlugon Gurlugon is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:13 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by zeldasbiggestfan
I cant have sex or get head though so that sucks.
In case it just comes along right like it always does, haha oh man sukcs to be u
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MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:13 PM       
Quote:
I cant have sex or get head though so that sucks.
Explain to me why this would be a problem for a chubby 14 year old?
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Juttin Juttin is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:17 PM       
He cannot find the girl for the sexing time
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:19 PM       
I have a girlfriend whos easy. Good and bad. She sucks and fucks alot but I dont know how many other people shes done it with
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Juttin Juttin is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:21 PM       
Easy WHAT? Easily amused?
You know, it's illegal to fuck the retarded ones. Rape, apparently
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:23 PM       
God damnit Juttin shut the fuck up. Your always fucking talking and you think your hot shit because you respond to everything. Your really just cold diarrhea
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Gurlugon Gurlugon is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:25 PM       
Y dont u put ur hemorrhaging rod in sum preteen zelda, u can od it

The fluids will be restorative.
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:26 PM       
Do you have ANY idea how PAINFUL that is?? Its like sticking you dick in boiling water.
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MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:28 PM       
Zeldasbiggestfan sounds like a virgin who has read one too many porn sites.

A girlfriend that's 'easy'? Well I wouldn't expect it to be especially difficult to have sex with her if she actually is your girlfriend.
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:30 PM       
I got laid on the first date and like 2 weeks later she was my girlfriend. So yeah.
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Juttin Juttin is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:30 PM       
That's the joke. Sounding like an obvious virgin
Isn't that the joke?

PLEASE TELL ME THAT'S THE JOKE :/
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Gurlugon Gurlugon is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:33 PM       
I enjoy toying with you. I guess I'm a homosexual pedophile. Thanks a lot, guys.
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zeldasbiggestfan zeldasbiggestfan is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:34 PM       
Your welcome. I know Im irresistable. (sp?)
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  #24  
Chojin Chojin is offline
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:36 PM       
dictionary.com
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Schimid Schimid is offline
...for breakfast?!
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Old Oct 26th, 2006, 09:38 PM       
LOL once i had a pimple on the side of mine

no joke
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