Look, you know I think of you like a son, right? A brother even! Heck, a son-brother!
But...sometimes...I guess what I'm trying to say is that all good things must come to an end. Frankly, your production has been down lately, and well, we think it might be best if you and I-Mockery's political board parted ways.
We've found someone else to take over as Chief Director of Conservative lunacy. I know you don't want to hear this, but I feel it may help you in future endeavors.
VinceZeb has everything we could want. He's conservative. He's vulgar. He's hostile. He's pretentious. And he clearly doesn't take his prescribed medication.
In less than one month here, he has accused the public education system of being the concentration camps of the Liberals, he has volunteered to break the wrists of protestors, and has likewise volunteered to "service" Max's wife. We feel he's probably the man for the job.
BUT, we here at I-Mockery & Mockery feel that this opens WHOLE new doors for you! There's always the music forum, where you can discuss Coldplay and stuff. I hear the Anti-rave forum is looking for a new "bad guy" as well!
I'm sorry to break this to you only a month or so after Ronald Reagan Day, but it had to be done. I'm sorry. Please have your desk cleaned out by Monday.