You decide to make an
attempt at romancing the big pterodactyl with your own personal
rendition of the Big Bopper's classic hit tune, "Chantilly Lace". Hey,
it worked with all the ladies. Ok, well these so-called "ladies" were
all part of your "dreams". And also, in said dreams, you had a voice
that put Sinatra to shame, as opposed to the
scrotum-being-raked-over-a-cheese-grater-sounding,
pathetically-high-pitched-nasal-shrill of an excuse for a voice that
you're toting in reality. Still, defying any logic and reason, you give
it a shot...
Chantilly
lace had a pretty face and a ponytail hangin' down
A wiggle in her walk and a giggle in her talk
Make the world go round
Ain't nothing in the world like a big eyed girl
To make me act so funny, make me spend my money
Make me feel real loose like a long necked goose
Like a--oh baby, that's a-what I like!
And before you can even
make it to the next verse, the pterodactyl interrupts you and reminds
you of how the Big Bopper tragically died in a plane crash. It seems as
though your ptero-pal doesn't appreciate your rendition, but has decided
you deserve a similar death. And while you're not riding in a plane, it
does drop you into the propeller of one flying nearby and you get
chopped up into little itty bits - just like that big guy from
Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. Only you're not even half the man he
was. And he probably had a better singing voice than you too.
