Features

Ronnie Raygun · #1

http://www.wbir.com/news/news.aspx?storyid=20241

UPDATE: Shots fired into Knox Bush/Cheney headquarters

An unknown suspect fired several shots into the Bearden office of the Bush/Cheney re-election campaign Tuesday morning.

The headquarters are located at 4618 Kingston Pike, next to Noveau Classics and in the same shopping plaza as Long's Drugstore.

According to Knoxville Police Department (KPD) officers on the scene Tuesday, it is believed that the two separate shots were fired from a car sometime between 6:30 am and 7:15 am.

One shot shattered the glass in the front door and the other cracked the glass in another of the front doors.

There were no witnesses to the shooting. A customer at a nearby dry cleaning store noticed shattered glass on the sidewalk in front of the headquarters and called police.

Volunteers and staffers at the campaign office say they have no clues as to who might have committed the crime. However, they add that the shooting makes them even more enthusiastic and energized about working for their candidates.

"If I have to sleep here (at the campaign office) now, that's what I'll do," says volunteer Suzanne Dewar.

In an unexpected twist, a bank directly across the street from the headquarters was robbed just as KPD officers were busy investigating at the scene of the shooting.

*********************

Anyone here wanna fess up???

Preechr · #2

They're just gonna blame it on Karl Rove, man.

mburbank · #3

I can't be bothered. I'll just quote some lines.

Liberals try to murder Bush campaign workers **not a joke***
-Naldo

An unknown suspect fired several shots
-The article Naldo posted

There were no witnesses to the shooting
-The article Naldo posted

Volunteers and staffers at the campaign office say they have no clues as to who might have committed the crime.
-The article he posted

**not a joke***
-Naldo

"I'm a idiot"
-Naldo

Joke
-Max

Emu · #4

Not all liberals are homicidal maniacs. Just a few. Repeat that to yourself.

glowbelly · #5

delete this thread

it has asterisks

Ronnie Raygun · #6

This thread is obviously a joke....

mburbank · #7

As cleverly pointed out by your republican use of the words "Not a joke."

I understood that.

Many republicans prefer to use words that mean the opposite of what they're saying.

For instance, the phrase "There is no doubt..." means "there's lots and lots of doubt."

The phrase "We have found the weapons of mass destruction" means "We have not found the weapons of mass destruction."

The phrase "Mission accomplished" means "We have not accomplished the mission."

and most recently in the debates "I'm working hard" means "I couldn't find my own ass with a map, a flashlight and a sherpa guide."

Preechr · #8

So, when Rummy held a press conference this morning to announce there would be no civil war in Iraq...

??

ziggytrix · #9

sounds more like anarchists than liberals to me.

mburbank · #10

Careful now! Rummy is beyond meta. A typical republican means the opposite of what he says. Rummy (known knowns) doesn't mean anything. His talk has purpose, but no content, like the ink a squid shoots out it's ass.

ziggytrix · #11

"purpose, but no content, like the ink a squid shoots out it's ass."
Brilliant! That's gotta be the simile of the year. And so apt!

Stark · #12

Suddenly that guy who faked the attack at the Kerry rally (with the crying daughter and torn up sign) comes to mind. One of the many times that he was 'attacked' by evil liberals he claimed that someone shot at him at a campaign headquarters. Is this place anywhere near the town that guy came from?

Jeanette X · #13

Ronnie, what part of "UNKNOWN SUSPECT" and "NO WITNESSES"didn't you understand? For all you know it was anarchists, terrorists, or just some random lunatic.

I mean, jeez. This is pitiful.