213 things skippy is no longer allowed to do in the u.s.army

[Johnyy Darko]

179. On Army documents, my race is not “Other”.
145. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.
146. Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
147. I should not threaten suicide with pop rocks and Coke
124. Two drink limit does not mean first and last.
96. “Redneck Zombies” is not a military training aid.
65. There are no evil clowns living under my bed.
60. “The Giant Space Ants” are not at the top of my chain of command.
56. An order to “Make my Boots black and shiny” does not involve electrical tape.
53. Not allowed to quote “Full Metal Jacket “ at the rifle range.