The OAO advice thread.

[Perndog]

I'm feeling remarkably charitable. Be grateful.

Jack, in high school, "I like you" or "I have a crush on you" is something you let a girl know AFTER the first date or two. It works the other way around. A girl has a crush on a guy and maybe she gets him. Guys who have crushes on girls and let it show NEVER get them except out of pity. You just have to figure out how to make the girl you're secretly interested in start liking you before you let on (to ANYONE) that you're secretly interested.

The other good option (better, if you have enough opportunities) is to ask a girl out (will you go out with me sometime?, NOT will you have my children?) as soon as you meet her before there's any bullshit about friendship or who has a crush on whom or whatever. If you don't ever meet new girls, then you've got to do something about that too, but first things first, eh?

No matter how much you analyze a situation, no one else involved is going to care. It doesn't matter if you have "a nice personality" (which is a euphemism for "you're creepy" half the time) or if you demonstrate blazing intellect. It doesn't even really matter what you look like. As long as the girl involved is over 12 years old, all that matters is that the thought of you triggers that part of her brain that makes her panties wet. You will not ever convince someone to start liking you, and unless you have several years to change a situation, you are defined forever in the mind of any given female by the first strong impression you make. In all of the situations you've described, your first strong impression has obviously been "creepy nerd." Figure out how to change that to "sexy nerd" or better yet, drop the nerd part altogether, and they'll just fall into your lap.