Some towels just get angry when they smoke too much weed. That anger leads them to say aggresive things.
Weed makes you mellow, Cheif.
And I shant be anyone's sidekick, god dammit.
I am THE SOLO SMOKING TOWEL.
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Gas and masturbation are highly unlikely to be connected with each other. Have you tried to stop masturbating? Has the gas subsided as a result? Perhaps you could try the same experiment by increasing the times you masturbate daily. Do you notice that the gas is increasing?