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Guitar Woman · #1

God damnit, this has to be the most shitty and overrated game in the universe. I had heard a lot of good things about this game and how great it was, but never got around to playing it. So I'm sitting here today with nothing to do, and I think "Hey, why don't I go check out Secret of Mana?" So I do. I go to coolrom.com and download it, then fire up ZSNES. I name my little guy Trance and start to play, ignoring how ugly and poorly animated the characters are, and then I get the sword. I try to fight a rabbite, and I discover that the combat system is weird and disorienting. Buuuuuuut since everyone keeps saying how great this game is, and how it's a SNES classic, I press on and try to get used to the gameplay. Then I get to the first boss and he kills me about 30 times with a homing attack that I can't avoid or stop, which he throws every 3 seconds, before I finally beat the buggy fucker into the dust. I think to myself, "Mabye I just need more practice. Yeah, that's it. I just started playing 3 minutes ago, so it's only natural for me to suck at this." Then I get to the second boss fight, and the same thing happens. I don't even have time to swing my sword at them before I die. I keep trying at it and build myself up to an absurdly high level (20), until, after 30 minutes and easily over 50 deaths, I realize the game just fucking sucks.

I demand an explanation of why everyone says Secret of Mana is good, because it really isn't. At all.

ItalianStereotype · #2

you're not very good at it :<

James · #3

There's no way SoM is as bad as you make it seem.

Are you rushing in and mashing the attack button? That's the only reason I can think of for you doing so poorly. Because you have a meter that has to reach 100% again before your attack is really effective.

Just never play SoM2. I don't know what happened there.

Guitar Woman · #4

Quote:

Originally Posted by James

Are you rushing in and mashing the attack button? That's the only reason I can think of for you doing so poorly. Because you have a meter that has to reach 100% again before your attack is really effective.

Yeah, I know that. I run up and attack an enemy and then run away, which isn't effective in boss fights because they all have long range attacks that are gay and fast and hard as shit to avoid.

Also, why are all the shopkeepers dancing? That's kind of weird. :o

James · #5

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman

Yeah, I know that. I run up and attack an enemy and then run away, which isn't effective in boss fights because they all have long range attacks that are gay and fast and hard as shit to avoid.

Also, why are all the shopkeepers dancing? That's kind of weird. :o

They all have Parkinson's, you jerk.

Just stock up on healing items early on, and make use of them so you don't die.

Have you gotten any other party members yet?

Supafly345 · #6

Secret of Evermore is much better IMO

Guitar Woman · #7

Quote:

Originally Posted by James

They all have Parkinson's, you jerk.

lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by James

Have you gotten any other party members yet?

No, I'm only at the second boss.

Jeff The Ninja · #8

Just stock up on as many items as you can, and play it defensive. You should have no problem as long as you have as many items as possible and use them all the time.

timrpgland · #9

GW you make me cry

Guitar Woman · #10

Why, because I don't like a terrible, overhyped piece of crap? I assume you also hate people for not liking FF7

timrpgland · #11

No, because you just suck at it. SoM isn't the BESTEST GREATEST game ever but it is a quite enjoyable RPG even 12 years later. Playing with 1 or 2 other friends is awesome and the gameplay is unique/enjoyable. You're just late to the game and it's ok that you don't know how to play SNES era games. I hate you for other reasons entirely.

edit: and you do realize the game wasn't really that hyped at all at the time

Guitar Woman · #12

Hey fuck you jerk, I grew up playing SNES games. I know how to play SNES games. I just can't play this one, because it sucks.

Edit: It doesn't matter when the game was hyped, just that it was hyped when it is, in fact, awful.

camacazio · #13

No, you're basically wrong on this. SoM is one of the greatest games. I can only conclude that you are a total fucking idiot. Also, I couldn't possibly explain why you'd have so much trouble playing it because it's such a god damn easy game.

timrpgland · #14

It's ok that you suck.

Emu · #15

Secret of Evermore is a lot better and a lot more underrated. If you can get past the main character's retarded puns, anyway.

Guitar Woman · #16

Ok I'll try it as long as it plays better than Mana

timrpgland · #17

Secret of Evermore is basically the same gameplay in a different setting and US made. It's also a enjoyable game but the coolest thing about Secret of Evermore is that Cecil runs a Inn in the game... they screwed him up though.

Guitar Woman · #18

Should I tell you that I also hate Final Fantasy 4? Because I do. For different reasons than I hate SoM, though.

camacazio · #19

I'll judge you harshly for that too, dick!

Edit: not really.

timrpgland · #20

Quote:

Should I tell you that I also hate Final Fantasy 4? Because I do. For different reasons than I hate SoM, though.

That's fine, I don't care but it makes me curious as to what SNES rpgs did you grow up with playing?

Guitar Woman · #21

FF4 was actually my first RPG ever, and it made me dislike the genre so much that I stayed away from it until Quest 64.

I wouldn't hate the game so much if they didn't make the death scenes so fucking cheesy, and if Rosa didn't play into the "Olive Oyl" stereotype every second that she's on the screen.

OH HELP ME CECIL I'M SICK WITH A FEVER AND I NEED YOU TO GET THE SANDRUBY FOR ME SO I CAN JOIN YOUR PARTY AS A HORRIBLY CRAPPY WHITE MAGE, OH CECIL I'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED AND AM BEING HELD AT THE TOP OF AN INCREDIBLY HIGH TOWER GUARDED BY AN UNSPEAKABLE AMOUNT OF ANNOYING CREATURES WITH WHOM FIGHTING BECOMES THE MOST FUCKING TEDIOUS THING IN ALL OF EXISTANCE AFTER 2 MINUTES, PLEASE SAVE ME SO WE CAN HAVE HARD SEX AFTER I HUMP YOUR LEG A MILLION TIMES IN FRONT OF ALL THE OTHER CHARACTERS BECAUSE I HAVE NO SHAME AT ALL, OH CECIL I JUST LOVE KISSING YOUR ASS, LET ME DO IT SOME MORE

Vampywampy · #22

SoM is better when playing it with another person. ;<

Seiken Densetsu 3 is awesome too, but I prefer SoM.

Guitar Woman · #23

I'm playing Evermore right now, and I have to say it's shitloads better than Mana. The difficulty has been toned way down to the point where it's still kind of hard but it's actually possible to progress through the game without wanting to run the programmers over with your car. I don't think I could play it without savestates, though ;<

Another thing I like about Evermore is the soundtrack. It's all cool and evil-sounding and stuff, unlike the semi-crappy music in SoM.

The only thing I don't like is how my little guy runs like a tard and has an ugly ducktail ;<