I am um-American

[James]

(Yes, UM-American)

I got MacDonald's the other day, because the new Chicken McNuggets give me a wicked hard-on. And on my fries, there was one of those peel-off game pieces for their latest contest.

It told me I did not win. Then, right below that, it told me I did not win... IN SPANISH. Apparently, game pieces now have to be bilingual.

Now, I got MacDonald's again today. 3 more game pieces. All said I did not win... all in a different way ("Sorry, maybe next time." or "Sorry, you can't always win."). And all said I did not win... IN SPANISH.

So, fuck you and your bilingual non-winning game tickets, America. Fuck you in your little hispanic ass.

And fuck you for lowering the chances of me getting a free ice cream or some shit. 4 losing pieces in a row? Fuck you. I remember when I could pull off a piece and AT LEAST win a fucking small fries. Fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU.