Home run "king" indicted

[Sethomas]

Hey El Blanco! Did you know that "pontificate" etymologically means "building bridges"? I just think that's pretty cool.

There are actually a lot of sports that I enjoy participating in. And, to be perfectly honest, when I kick a soccer ball I don't ruminate on the Confucian idea that it symbolizes a demonic head. But when it comes to professional athletics and its long and lurid history with the soft sciences, I think there's a lot to say about it being a sociological parasite. I mean, by being a PART OF THE SYSTEM I guess I have little room to talk. Some minimum wage sap pays $80 for a Peyton Manning jersey because it's LOCAL PRIDE, even though that handsome bloke only lives here because some nebulous corporation paid him countless millions to move here. The NFL takes in a tidy sliver of the profits to plug in countless millions into an otherwise pointless facility in downtown Indianapolis, and eventually down the line my dad gets paid a relatively minuscule fee to X-ray some moron millionaire athlete who'll probably be dead at 55 from some muscular dysmorphia-related ailment. And, as is the American way, my daddy pays for most of my college expenses. I'M A HYPOCRITE, GUYS.