The Ten Gayest Masters of the Universe

[MockBot]

Automatically generated comment thread for The Ten Gayest Masters of the Universe.

[Oska_Go_Wilde]

First comment cheer! Hoo-rah.

How on Earth do people in Eternia reproduce if most of them ride the rainbow? Srsly.

PS: Check the username. I know my gay.

[Purple Man]

In hindsight, the whole thing is seriously messed up. Who was making these things? The real giveaway is how the character names sound like pornos. "Fisto"? "Ram-Man"?

You have now planted the horrific and unnatural image of He-Man totally doing his Prince Adam self in my mind, and it will never leave.

The horror...the horror...

[stevetothepast]

"yet he proudly wears a skirt because he doesn't give a fuck what you think."
Genius

"Ram Man". Sure, I suppose he could "ram" the ladies, but not like this. Not like this."
Pure Genius

[Jonny#5]

Funny article. The only thing I disagree with is Orko, since flamboyant homosexuals like to show off their appearance while Orko seems to go out of his way to hide as much of his body as possible. Considering how bony his arms are, nobody can blame him.

[Angryhydralisk]

This is the single funniest thing I've read in weeks. And isn't like, everything in the 80s homo-erotic in some sense? Like action movies?

[mburbank]

I laughed continuosly from #3 on down. Good Lord! I was in college when these came out and missed the whole He-Man scene entirely. Too funny.

[hobbsend]

Nicely done proto! That's one hell of a task trying to pick the gayest of cast who apparently were all sailing the anal seas. I agree with Teela, if you ever watch the episode where she and Evil-Lyn team up? Notice how much Evil-Lyn looked like Anne Heche?

[incognit000]

A show filled with large, muscled male characters who do not wear pants?

No, not gay at all...

I think that the number of parody songs/cartoons/animations that make Eternia out to be very gay shows that all of us are in on the joke.

[GRUMPYNZ]

Good work. I can imagine there was a whole lot of other characters that could have been on the list! Mossman or Stinkor, perhaps?

[BakaGaijin]

I had boxes of Masters of the Universe toys and used to make them all simulate sex with the Teela and Evil-Lyn toys. It's not gay to touch wieners with another dude if it's in a female's mouth, is it?

[Tadao]

Having a box full pantless male dolls is pretty gay.

[greenimp]

ram-man looks like he just wants to be a pretty little princess

[Qwarx]

Stratos looks like a chicken of some sort.

[Nktalloth]

@GRUMPYNZ

Stinkor is disqualified by virtue of the fact that homosexuals tend to take good care of their bodies. Stinkor's power is overpowering B.O., so...

[Colonel Flagg]

Good gravy! I never realized that Saturday morning cartoons were pay-per-view!

[Protoclown]

Originally Posted by Nktalloth

@GRUMPYNZ

Stinkor is disqualified by virtue of the fact that homosexuals tend to take good care of their bodies. Stinkor's power is overpowering B.O., so...

That is PRECISELY why I left him off the list, actually.

And thanks, guys. Glad you enjoyed the piece!

[Albino Bat]

I totally agree on that gimp suit >< talk about ruining innocence.

[Nick]

Well this changes everything...

[Pentegarn]

I thought roughly the same thing about the show when I watched it again as an adult. I watched He-Man religiously as a kid, and my mom took a pretty active interest in what I was doing as a kid as well. How she did not ban me from watching this is beyond my skills to surmise.

[Sleazeappeal]

Oh, come ON! Skeletor was the Godmother of Eternia and don't try to tell me different!

Why do you think they had him talk like Charles Nelson Reilley?

[Dungeonbrownies]

the pure amount of perversion made the show practically unwatchable for me.
IM sure as hell glad this never made it to live action film...

[Autrach Sejanoz]

Personally, I would have swapped Ram Man and Fisto's positions on the list.

Man that just sounds wrong...

[Ruinne]

'the pure amount of perversion made the show practically unwatchable for me.
IM sure as hell glad this never made it to live action film... '

"Hehehe...That's because the live action movie has been put off until 2009..."

[Desert_Screams]

Sleazeappeal is absolutely right about this: Skeletor was the ruler of Eternia's velvet underground. He sounded more jacked-up than Cobra Commander...that had to be some kind of a clue....