Skippy Peanut Butter

[Captain Robo]

I just saw a commercial that included some little black kid rapping about "Skippy Peanut Butter in a Squeeze tube!"

Apparently, the "Go-Gurt" craze has reached new levels, as many food companies have put out annoying advertising campaigns showing off their latest "Go-Gurt" proxy. Following suit quickly behind Dannon and Jello, Skippy Peanut Butter will now be sold in "squeeze tubes" for "on the go snacking."

First of all, who the fuck would eat peanut butter out of a squeeze bag? Skippy isn't even that great anyway.

Second, it's not crunchy peanut butter.

Third, it's not crunchy peanut butter.

Fourth, you know that this "newfangled thing" from Skippy is going to pose a threat to JIF. In fact, I predict that JIF will start producing their own line of "Go-Gurt" ripoffs just to combat Skippy's sales!

Fifth, it's not crunchy peanut butter.

Sixth, I'm tired of writing this and I'm going to bed. You should too.