My Favorite Movie Assholes

[Tom Foolery]

Three Words... Judge Elihu Smails

Played by Ted Knight in the epic classic, Caddyshack. Not only did he have great memorable one-liners like, "Spaulding get your foot off the boat!", "Don't you people have homes?", and "Well the world needxs ditch diggers too." But he wrote a beutiful poem about being an asshole.

It's easy to grin
When your ship comes in
And you've got the stack market beat
But the man worth while
Is the man who can smile
When his shorts are too tight in the seat

Nothing says smuggness like that. He's so much of an asshole that he makes Ty Webb (a tremendous asshole character) seem like a charming guy throughout the whole movie.