Quote:
Originally Posted by 90's Child
Thanks. By the way, have you ever considered trying to become an editor or a creative writing teacher. Because, I must say, you certainly have the skills at constructive criticism to do so.
And also, I just re-wrote that first dream sequence, and I just wanted to show it to you. Here it is:
So, what do ya think?
Also, what's your opinion on the transformation sequences? Are they any good, or too redundant?
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I hate people too much to sit in a room with them for too long.
The re-write is good, You have room to flesh it out a little more if you wanted but as far as openig go, the hardest part is for a read to open at page one and get orientated. I would keep it as it is. That is the first paragraph in the first chapter right? Once the story starts rolling is when you can start rambling more.
Paste the transformation paragraph for me, I didn't read most of it because it hurt too much
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