I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

[Fathom Zero]

I'm watching MSNBC in the union and this appeared on-screen:

THREE ENVELOPES TEST POSITIVE FOR FLOUR

[Guitar Woman]

http://nedroid.com/comic/comics/2009-07-29-beartato-confetti.gif

[Shrubfest]

I just 'broke up' with some guy I had sex with twice and who keeps sending me texts about wanting to meet up because I'm a cool person.

I felt gooooooood after. Stupid army boy.

[RaNkeri]

Gonna get my H1N1 shot tomorrow.


If I'm lucky

[stevetothepast]

shrubfest keeps it REAL.

[Fathom Zero]

Shrub, if you want to jump the bones of some dudes with minimal emotional attachment, look no further than creepy internet dudes.

[Dixie]

Shrub, if you want to jump the bones of some dudes with minimal emotional attachment, look no further than creepy internet dudes.
or she could come visit me and borrow some of mine

[Fathom Zero]

You'd be thick as thieves.

[Babs]

I just 'broke up' with some guy I had sex with twice and who keeps sending me texts about wanting to meet up because I'm a cool person.

I felt gooooooood after. Stupid army boy.

We should meet up, you're a cool person.

[Dimnos]

Apparently she doesnt like guys who think she is cool. :rolleyes

[Shrubfest]

I don't like guys who constantly ask me if I need their dick right now. And try to sext without any punctuation. AT ALL.

[Babs]

What's texting?

[Dimnos]

I just 'broke up' with some guy a-hole I had sex with let plow me twice and who now keeps sending me texts about wanting to meet up sexually harassing me because I'm a cool person.

I felt gooooooood after. Stupid army boy.

Call me Sam. ;)

There you go.

[Aaarg]

i got a new computer, and the flu.

[Kitsa]

I'm sorry.

I had chocolate cake with my lunch. Then I threw up chocolate cake. Now my stomach hurts :(

[kahljorn]

That picture of dramamine with a gun posted afterwords still makes me laugh :( did you try to do dramamine fathom zero?

[Fathom Zero]

Everything makes me sick and dizzy and not fun. I'm a spoil-sport.

[Fathom Zero]

And everyone was chiming in with their life-enhancers, I thought I should add mine.

[kahljorn]

oh i know a few people who have tried to do dramamine as a recreational drug, and they were so miserable the entire time that i thought the gun was hilarous.

He Shrubfest want to meet up and get my meat up ;) ;)

[elx]

i hope no one here liked dollhouse :3

[Sam]

HELLO LADIES SHRUBFEST, SAM IS HERE. ;)

[Fathom Zero]

i hope no one here liked dollhouse :3

It's the shittiest show I've seen in a long time. Apparently somebody that's nerd-famous is behind it, but I couldn't give a rat's ass. Eliza Dushku couldn't act her way out of a paper bag.

[Kitsa]

dammit, I hate when someone calls with a wrong number at like midnight :(

[Aaarg]

ah man, that's just not right.

[DevilWearsPrada]

Some old lady called my house and asked for layton or lester or something on at least 3 seperate occasions and each time I've told her she's got the wrong number and she sounds so sad when I tell her :(

[Shrubfest]

If anyone can find a good theatre costume placement near them, I'll come live with them. :)

[RaNkeri]

Got my shot

[Zhukov]

Well if Rankeri has a shot at Shrubfest then I guess anyone does.

[Aaarg]

b-u-r-n

[Zhukov]

Oh, I didn't mean anything by it.

[Pub Lover]

Mattjack doesn't get his own thread?

Screw this place man, you're better than this!

[Tadao]

Pub made a thread? :x

[Dr. Boogie]

So I moved the birthday props to Pub's thread, but that wound up turning it into Tadao's thread.:lol

[Pub Lover]

Thank you, Doctor. :)
http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww161/kelcnr/2bunnies1cup.png


I think the other rabbit fainted from excitement because the other bunny gave him some hot cocoa, and it was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for him :)

You two are soooooo cute. <3

[Wiffles]

So I moved the birthday props to Pub's thread, but that wound up turning it into Tadao's thread.:lol

I bet Pub planned it with cold-steel precision all along :)

[Guitar Woman]

Ok, so kratom works, I guess, but you have to take a fucking lot of it.

I ate 25 caps over the last hour and I'm only starting to feel anything. It's kind of like when you've had a few drinks and aren't quite drunk yet. It's supposed to take effect in about 15 minutes, but I guess it could be delayed because I bought them as pills.

[The Leader]

Just wait.

[kahljorn]

where do you get your ethneobotanicals from?

[Guitar Woman]

http://www.kratomcaps.com/

I'm not sure if this is the best deal out there; I paid 27 bucks for about 113 pills/56 grams/2 ounces, which is about 4 and a half good doses, or three good doses and one really good dose.

It feels kind of like if you took that topical anesthetic the dentist puts on your gums before shooting you up with Novocaine and somehow distributed it through your entire body. It feels like that stuff just as it's starting to take effect or wear off. It's also got a stimulant effect, but it's harder to notice under the sedative feeling. This guy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=462KJRd-oVY) describes the downer feeling like a mild opiate, so I guess it's kind of like baby's first speedball. If I had a few drinks on top of this it'd be perfect.

I wouldn't be afraid to buy it as just powder or shredded leaves, either; I opened a cap and just ate the plant matter inside, and it tasted like if you ripped open a bag of Earl Gray and sucked on it. So, the tea would probably be pretty good.

[kahljorn]

i always got my stuff from www.iamshaman.com (http://www.iamshaman.com) and www.bouncingbearbotanicals.com (http://www.bouncingbearbotanicals.com) , the later of which has those frogs you can lick and get fucked up on :O those sites have pure 20x extractsof kratom for a pretty reasonable deal.

you should try ayahausca/yage (they dont sell it on the shaman site now) or san pedro :O although they aren't nearly as casual as kratom probably. ive amanita muscaria and its alright. Like a mild shroom experience, or a shroom experience with more of the euphoric rather than hallucinagenic aspects. If you're looking for a euphoric, sedative type of effect that might be up your alley

[Guitar Woman]

San Pedro's the mescaline cactus, right?

Or is that peyote? I've always wanted to try that; whenever I start going to Walter Cronkite in Phoenix I might ramble into the desert and pick some buttons, but who knows when I'm going to get the credentials to attend that place.

[kahljorn]

both of them have mescaline. If you can go into a desert and find buttons by all means.. but you can also find san pedro just about anywhere since it is used as a landscaping plant (although there might not be a lot of cactus where you live), along with a lot of other cactii which have mescaline in them. Depending on who you ask san pedro has a similar/more/slightly less mescaline content than peyote, and it grows huge very fast, so its usually better :O

[Dixie]

If anyone can find a good theatre costume placement near them, I'll come live with them. :)
I know people....

[Guitar Woman]

Ok, I was wrong: don't fucking drink on kratom.

Two glasses of wine had me leaning on the toilet about ready to throw up. Luckily I got courageous enough to try to get to the sink and have a few handfuls of water before I lost it, so that didn't happen. I also feel dizzy and am having a hard time standing for very long.

[MarioRPG]

Ugh at least you didn't puke it all out.

[Guitar Woman]

Then again, wine usually makes my stomach feel like shit, so maybe a beer or two would still be fine.

[Tadao]

Puking it out is probably what you should do.

[Guitar Woman]

Probably, but fuck that.

I like to drink and get high, but I don't do it so much that I've gotten used to throwing up.

[kahljorn]

I would recommend not drinking when you do any drug except maybe uppers :O but then its pointless cause you dont even get drunk ;/ maybe opiates but ugh. oh and drinking after your acid peak is over is alright

plus being drunk is such a shitty high. Why fuck up a good high by feeling drunk?

[Guitar Woman]

Yeah, I used to drink a lot, but after I started dexing regularly I realized how awful it was. Fuck yeah, depression and telling people shit that makes you look like an idiot.

Alcohol is also really, really bad for you.

[Pub Lover]

I happen to like feeling depressed and telling people things that make me look like an idiot. >:

[Guitar Woman]

Although I still love the shit out of spiced rum, and Oregon microbrews, and white russians, and pina coladas.

[Sam]

BOOZE IS WONDERFUL >:

[Guitar Woman]

And gin, I really like gin

I've never had whiskey but I probably should before I lose interest completely and become a heroin addict. I might try Jameson just because of how fucking manly the commercials are.

And Wild Turkey, both 100 proof and rye variants.

[kahljorn]

my woman baked me four pies today :O

[Sam]

are they for our L4D2 party next week? :o

[Fathom Zero]

They're for the Pie Orgy.

[Sam]

DUH, WHICH IS PART OF THE L4D2 PARTY NEXT WEEK >:

GET YOUR SHIT RIGHT DYLAN

[Fathom Zero]

Too bad I'm not playing it.

[Sam]

OH WELL, THAT DOESN'T STOP THE PARTY, NOR THE PIE ORGY

[kahljorn]

Fathom Zero is too GOOD for a pie orgy.

[Fathom Zero]

I'm pissed I'm missing it. >:

[kahljorn]

You poor thing :tear

[Fathom Zero]

It's okay, I'm gonna microwave an orange.

[Sam]

I hate oranges

[Sam]

That isn't true, I love to eat oranges.

[Fathom Zero]

I'm not gonna eat it.

[Sam]

IS THAT SOME KIND OF LEWD SEX JOKE? >:

[Fathom Zero]

No actually, I just thought it would me amusing to microwave an orange.

[Sam]

YOU CRETIN

[kahljorn]

THATS A LIVING LIFE FORM, GORDON GEKKO

YOU FUCK

[Kitsa]

Heh. My dad just had shoulder surgery last week, his arm is in a sling.

The substitute dentist walked into the room and slapped him square on the shoulder in greeting, then said, "OH, GUESS I SHOULDN'T BE DOING THAT, YOU HAVE A SLING"...then proceeded to do it two more times during the visit.

>:

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I hope your dad's arm heals quickly Kitsa.


Funny story for Oxblood: I used to work with this guy named Christian. He grew up in Germany and moved to the United States when he was about 25. He watched the original "DIE HARD" when he was still in Germany so everyone was German dubbed. A number of years later he ended up watching "DIE HARD" after getting to the U.S. Halfway through the movie he asked someone why were the terrorists still speaking German but everyone else was speaking English. His friend then replied with "What? They're speaking German because they're the bad guys."

:lol

He didn't find it as funny at first but he laughs at it now.

[Dimnos]

Oh those silly crouts. :lol

[RaNkeri]

Hans: "Karl, Schiess dem fenster"

Karl: "...?"

Hans: "Shoot THE GLASS"

[kahljorn]

OOPS :(

[Wiffles]

eeewww o.o

[RaNkeri]

It's from Die Hard you guys! :rolleyes

[Zhukov]

Krauts.

[Colonel Flagg]

Germans so dumb they don't understand German ....

[Chojin]

i just bought some sauerkraut today, because i'm back on another diet stretch and looking at the nutrition facts, it's basically pure fiber :O

also i like sauerkraut and it makes me feel like more of a german ;<

[Fathom Zero]

I was raised on sauerkraut. I LOVE PICKLES.

[Colonel Flagg]

I :love 'kraut, pickles, vinegar, wasabi, curry, tabasco - basically anything that burns me. :)

[kahljorn]

I almost bought some saurkraut the other day for the same reasons :O

I got artichokes instead :O

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I sit at a desk all day. We dont have stairs or anything for me to take advantage of. :\

I don't know if I'm drunk most of the time or just have a shit poor memory. I thought you were an airline mechanic.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I'm off to the titty bar.

[Fathom Zero]

wVBoqM_Ut8g

So how 'bout that new Electric Wiz EP that's supposed to come out sometime?

[stevetothepast]

I don't know if I'm drunk most of the time or just have a shit poor memory. I thought you were an airline mechanic.

I think he sits behind a desk at an airplane mechanics place or something.

[Nick]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v473/Psycho8/IMG_0278-1.jpg

I got a kitty. :3

[Kitsa]

That's a sweet kitty :) Look at the little pink nose and toes!

[Nick]

I adopted him from a no kill animal shelter on Veteran's Day. He's 14 weeks old and full of trouble. :)

[Seven Force]

i just bought some sauerkraut today, because i'm back on another diet stretch and looking at the nutrition facts, it's basically pure fiber :O

also i like sauerkraut and it makes me feel like more of a german ;<

I've always wondered about what that tastes like

[stevetothepast]

It's very good on sausages.

[Guitar Woman]

It tastes like fascism, son

[captain516]

Sauerkraut? I think you mean "Liberty Cabbage".

[Fathom Zero]

:lol

[kahljorn]

I had some sauerkraut and its kinda gross :(

[Kitsa]

I can't stand the smell of sauerkraut. Ugh.

[kahljorn]

:lol
my girlfriend had to leave the room.

[Colonel Flagg]

Certain things taste better when they're soaked in brine for awhile. Sliced beef, cabbage, cucumbers, ....

On another subject, malt vinegar and french fries kicks ass.

[Fathom Zero]

Malt vinegar and the fried fishies. Yum.

[Sam]

MALT LIQUOR AND FISHIES. YUM.

[Fathom Zero]

Malt liquor and bitches. AWWW SHIT.

[elx]

tonight is so boring :(

[Seven Force]

Malt vinegar and the fried fishies. Yum.

Now I know what im going to have for dinner thank you :lol

[Zhukov]

tonight is so boring :(

Yeah, well sorry I was at work!



What is that German dish where it's basicaly grated potato that's been fried? I had it once and I couldn't get enough of it.

[Kitsa]

Not sure, but German soups are some of the best I've ever had. I think it's because of the loads of sour cream they put in them.

Alsatian pizza (flammekueche) is also fantastic. You can take your standard pizza dough, stretch it thin with a thicker rim, pour on whipping cream instead of tomato sauce, then top with onion and (preferably, but I don't) ham. Cheese on top of that, cook it like a pizza, it's delicious.

Alsace represent.

[stevetothepast]

I love bubble and squeak

[Aaarg]

http://www.klimp.dk/glown/paint/scream.gif

[MarioRPG]

Kitsa, that sounds weird as fuck.

[Kitsa]

It sounds weird, especially the heavy whipping cream instead of tomato sauce, but I assure you it's excellent. Think more like alfredo, but not as thick.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarte_flamb%C3%A9e (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarte_flamb%C3%A9e)

My parents make theirs with white onion and canadian bacon and it's wonderful.

[Kitsa]

The fuck, is this "say creepy shit to Kitsa" day and I didn't mark it down on my calendar?

I had a REALLY good dream this time if you know what I mean KITSA ;)


When I die your world ends too, Kitsa, unfortunately.

[Tadao]

What kind of wine would go good with wheat pasta, 3 cheese red sauce and turkey sausage? :(

[Kitsa]

I'd do syrah but that's just me.

[kahljorn]

TRY A NICE BOTTLE OF CARDBOARD. IT TASTES EXCELLENT WITH TURKEY SAUSAGE.

[Dimnos]

BEER.

[stevetothepast]

what dimnos said

[Guitar Woman]

Wild Irish Rose.

[Aaarg]

there was an almost-empty gallon bottle of arizona green tea sitting on the counter in the kitchen for maybe a month and a half. i opened it and that shit smelt like wine. try that!

[Guitar Woman]

Man, I fucked up my in-class presentation.

All aboard the D train!

[Fathom Zero]

One point is better than no points. Especially when it is multiplied by seven hours like one of my classsses.

[Fathom Zero]

YESSSSSSSSSSSS AVATARRRR

[Chojin]

every time i'm on a diet stretch, i feel uncomfortably nauseous all day

shit sux

but THAT IS HOW WINNIN' IS DONE

[Guitar Woman]

Might I recommend marijuana?

Clinically proven to kill nausea dead!

[The Leader]

:pagebrak

[The Leader]

Fathom Zero, your avatar = one of my guilty pleasures.

[Fathom Zero]

So beautiful... and yet so dangerous. :D

[The Leader]

Harry Canyon was my favorite one. They talk about how they did his stubble on the DVD commentary. :)

[Fathom Zero]

My favourite is always So Beautiful So Dangerous, but I dig CAPTAIN STERNN too.

[The Leader]

Why has no one posted in here in two days? :(

[Shrubfest]

Fathom killed it. :(

[Tadao]

jerk

[Fathom Zero]

That can't be right. There was stuff here. I know it.

[Kitsa]

I made 233 oreo balls today for two office parties tomorrow. It took from 8a-2p to get them finished. That's some effort-intensive candy :(

[Babs]

What kind of office party is this now?

[Fathom Zero]

AN UNDEAD OFFICE PARTY

[Kitsa]

one office party for my dad, one for my fiance. Oreo balls are kind of like chocolate crack, so I always have to make a lot of them.

[Aaarg]

oreo balls sound fucking fantastic.

[Kitsa]

They are, and they're not hard to make...it just takes a long time.

One brick of cream cheese (real, not neufchatel) and one package of oreos makes either 35 ping pong ball sized ones or nearly 75 shooter-marble sized ones.

Bring the block of cream cheese to room temperature and grind the oreos to a fine powder in a food processor, then use a mixer to combine them into a thick paste. When the paste is thick and consistent, roll it into balls and plop them on a parchment-lined cookie sheet.

Then melt chocolate (chips or melting chocolate) in a double-boiler and dip each one. When you've dipped them all, pop them in the freezer just long enough for the chocolate to set (dry to the touch, not long enough to crack). Transfer to a cooling plate or rack and drizzle with a contrastring color of chocolate.

Good stuff. Hard to keep track of how many you're eating though :(

[Babs]

So.... you didn't make any for anyone here I see.

[Dimnos]

I made a cheese ball and a bunch of sausage balls for an office party. They were great. :yum

[The Leader]

A single cheese ball? Did you throw yourself an office party, Dimnos?

[Kitsa]

Babs: no, but I taught you how. That's better.

Give a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

[Fathom Zero]

A cheese ball is about as big as a softball and people cut chunks out of it to spread on crackers.

[Kitsa]

I used to make one that was a flat teardrop-shape, and I pushed toasted pecans into it so it looked like a giant pinecone.

[Fathom Zero]

That sounds absolutely delicious.

[The Leader]

Balls of cheese are disgusting anyway. :<

[stevetothepast]

cheese balls are awesome, you don't know what you are talking about. Add in the fact that he had sausage and you're ready for a good time.

[The Leader]

I'm vegetarian.:\

[stevetothepast]

pansy

[Sam]

FUCKING HELL

[executioneer]

LUNG FLICK, EH

[Colonel Flagg]

JESUS CHRIST I'M HUNGRY AGAIN! >:

[Guitar Woman]

I love almost getting eaten by rabid college students when I tell them Michael Moore is a manipulative brother-in-arms to Bill O'Reilley

[Zhukov]

Somebody should make me a cheesecake. I'm too tired and ill to do it myself.

[captain516]

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2486/4116126039_c9b2135e4d_b.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

Wait. Wait.

Wait.

How did Mumbles Menino get re-elected?

[executioneer]

SIGNATURE CHANGE

[Fathom Zero]

A journal a day is really good to help you stick to something, no matter how douchey it sounds.

I cringe every time I see mine.

[Guitar Woman]

you could write a page and burn it.

Or flush it down the toilet.

[Shrubfest]

Today makes my digestive system hate me. :(

[Fathom Zero]

Awwwww. Feeling bloated?

Shouldn't eat those chicken donuts. I know; I have a hard time staying away from them too.

[Shrubfest]

Actually, it's stress and cranberries. If I'd eaten a chicken doughnut, I'd have migrane instead.

[Fathom Zero]

Eat more meat. A cheeseburger with jalepenos, mayo, and pineapple will clean you right out.

[Shrubfest]

I'm just gonna stop eating and live of water and teas for a while.

[Fathom Zero]

You know that won't make you feel any better, right? Your bowels will be empty and angry at you and your negligence.

[Aaarg]

but water and tea is yum-tastic!

[Kitsa]

Cranberries are wonderful :(

[Aaarg]

http://www.klimp.dk/glown/paint/silhouttree.gif

[stevetothepast]

HEY WILLIE I NOTICED YOU CHANGED YOUR SIGNATURE.

HEY SAM, FUCKING HELL, HOW IS L4D2?

[MarioRPG]

Captain516: I just changed my background from a picture of that character. The one where he's all sad :(

[Fathom Zero]

:lol

So I had my media player on and it aggregates a list based on every .mp3 on my computer. A song came on such that I couldn't remember what it was. It was badass, quite badass.

I pulled up the player and it turns out to be one of Mattjack's unfinished works. :lol

[Fathom Zero]

HIX2RAHPTsI

Hey, it's that one song

[Pub Lover]

Sure lotta talk of food outside the Food Forum going on. :rolleyes
pansy
You put a Page Brak in the New People thread and miss it in here? I'm forgetting your name, Canada.
I like the idea of the Stupid people thread.
This is the Stupid People Thread. :(
Is that a fossil in your pocket or are you just happy to see me :)
<3
do you enjoy long walks on the beach under the moonlight while reciting erotic literature? ;)
<2

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak

[Kitsa]

Sure lotta talk of food outside the Food Forum going on. :rolleyes

I keep forgetting that this is the "Pub believes we're soliciting his opinion in other threads for express elaboration here" thread. Dammit, when are we going to get that straight? :\

[Pub Lover]

I believe you can find the Food Forum quite easily if you go back to 2003. :eek

[Tadao]

I LIKE SKA!

[Shrubfest]

I like tea.

[Tadao]

I LIKE TARTS AND TEA, YOU SHOULD COME OVER.

[Fathom Zero]

You can find the food forum if you go back two years ago. >:

[Shrubfest]

BADUM-TISH!

[Kitsa]

I was in a store today and there was some screaming little kid who was throwing a fit about not getting candy or something. And his way of conveying this displeasure was to snatch glass/ceramic items off shelves and hurl them at the floor.

And his mom was shuffling along saying, "Be quiet, okay? Be good, okay?" like he wasn't smashing tons of glassware in the middle of a store right in front of her.

Wonder what that kid's gonna be like when he's older.

[Tadao]

A republican

[Kitsa]

As for me, and to a much MUCH lesser extent my brother...we were completely terrified of my parents. When threatened with going out to the car, that was enough to keep us on the straight and narrow because we damn sure knew what that meant.

The one time my brother hid from my mom in a department store, she went to the service desk and specifically requested he be paged, overhead, to come to the bra department.

[Fathom Zero]

That kid would so get hurled out of the store like a frisbee if he were mine. Shopping would be done and I would lock the little bastard in a closet.

[Babs]

Nothing's more embarrassing than my girl friends two brothers. One is 14 who continuously keeps gaining weight, he's roughly around 260 and I get so disgusted every time I look at him. Always fucking bitching about who ate his cupcakes and shit. STUPID FAT FUCK. The other is 18 and tries to act "gangsta" and is a dopey dumbass that looks like a dog with down syndrome. He's a sick fuck, I went into his computer history and saw nothing but the history being flooded with rape porn and rape fantasy porn. He's a little piece of shit, always talking behind my back. So one day, I decided to confront him at this bonfire we had behind my girlfriend's parents place, the little prick had nothing to say. I told him straight to his face, "I don't know what's wrong with you and your family, but you need cut out the bullshit and if you have anything to say, say it now or just have it come back and get you later". Just like a dog with it's tail in between its legs, the Lil' Wayne impersonator had nothing to say. GOD DAMNIT! I hate her fucking family and their thieving, conniving, stubborn, pathetic lives.

[stevetothepast]

You put a Page Brak in the New People thread and miss it in here? I'm forgetting your name, Canada.



Whatever you say Big Tex

[elx]

left 4 dead 2 modern warfare 2 and dragon origins need to die :(

[Dimnos]

Piss off hater. >:

[Dimnos]

Oh and take it to the Lets Argue About Video Games thread.

;publover

[elx]

every single boy is ignoring me this week, not only that, but i've actually noticed that the internet has become more boring. and now i know why:(

[Fathom Zero]

Say, baby... Why you bein' ignored?

I totally can't tell that you're boring as fuck. You seem pretty cool to me.

[Fathom Zero]

But really, stop calling them boys if you want them to pay attention to you. Call them guys or dudes. It makes them sound mature to you.

[elx]

it's cause they're all playing xbox:(

[Fathom Zero]

Quit trying to grab some preteen strange.

Perhaps guys these days don't have their priorities in line.

[elx]

what

[Sam]

DRAGON AGEEEEEEE

[Fathom Zero]

Any guy more willing to play video games than hang out with a girl is either gay or has serious issues with priorities.

[Fathom Zero]

Hey, change of subject.

Let's talk about Sam's cock.

[elx]

did you hear about his legs

[Sam]

I'M CRIPPLED

I GOT WHAT FDR HAD AND MY LEGS LOOK LIKE CRAZY STRAWS

[Kitsa]

that's true until they start taking it for granted that there'll be a girl around.

attention is overrated.

[Sam]

THAT'S WHY I PLAY DRAGON AGE

[Dimnos]

Any guy more willing to play video games than hang out with a girl is either gay or has serious issues with priorities.

Or they dont want to hear some girl prattle on about some pointless BS. :rolleyes

[Sam]

USUALLY IF YOU JUST IGNORE A GIRL AND PLAY VIDEO GAMES IT DRIVES THEM MAD WITH SEXUAL DESIRE AND THEY BUST OUT AND PERFORM FELLATIO ON YOU.

[Dimnos]

USUALLY IF YOU JUST IGNORE A GIRL AND PLAY VIDEO GAMES IT DRIVES THEM MAD WITH SEXUAL DESIRE AND THEY BUST OUT AND PERFORM FELLATIO ON YOU.

This is how I ended up with a wife. True story.

[Sam]

SHE SOUNDS LIKE A KEEPER

[Dimnos]

Oh she is great. I wouldnt trade her for a million bucks. Totally not like George's woman.







No offense George. :\

[elx]

i don't mind video games as long as i get to play too :(

[Sam]

THE REAL TEST IS WHEN SHE IS ORALLY STIMULATING YOU AND YOU "ACCIDENTALLY" RELEASE A FART. IF SHE DOESN'T SKIP A BEAT THEN HOLD ON TO HER, BUT IF SHE GAGS AND COMPLAINS THROW HER ASS TO THE CURB.

[Dimnos]

What if she pauses for a moment to giggle then jumps back on it?

[Sam]

You have to decode if it's a giggle of amusement or a nervous giggle and she assumes you are going to crap on her somehow. :\

[Dimnos]

Oh it definitely amusement with a smile.

I wanted to shoot her in the chin or something at the time but couldnt squeeze one out fast enough. :\

[Sam]

Shoot her with a fart?

[Dimnos]

No a load. After she came up to giggle about the fart.

[Sam]

OH. CHOKE HER OUT WITH THE "PUERTO RICAN FOGBANK"

[Dimnos]

Something like that. But I wasnt quick enough. :lol

[Sam]

If I was a pro-wrestler, I'd gimmick as a masked Puerto Rican wrestler and the name of my submission hold would be "The Puerto Rican Fogbank" :(

[Tadao]

:rolleyes
ELX learn to play something other than Barbie Make Me Pretty Photoshop

[Sam]

YEAH ELX LEARN TO PLAY LEFT 4 DEAD 2 WITH THE GROWN-UPS

[Dimnos]

Or ask them to watch porn with you.

[Sam]

OR SMOKE POT OUT OF YOUR AMAZING APPLE POT SMOKING DEVICE YOU DESIGNED

[Dimnos]

Skinny blond girl with pot and an apple bong never got turned down.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

:pagebrak

I'm gonna rent L4D2 tonight to play because I need some time away from my girlfriend.

I can't even play STAR OCEAN because gf gets annoyed.

She's all like "Hey, what're ya doing? Wanna snuggle?"

and I'm all like "Can't, doing MAN STUFF."

"Oh, are you still playing that game? You've been playing for like 2 hours now."

so I say "WTF, I only killed 20 Psynards and haven't even fought the boss yet!"

[Tadao]

They need to make a controller that allows you to snuggle and play games at the same time. Like the Tim and Eric concert girlfriend holder thing.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

My friend used to have the RPG controller for PS1 where all the buttons were condensed to use one hand.

[Tadao]

I had that, wouldn't work for L4D2 or MW2 though.

[Sam]

IT WORKS WONDERS FOR PLAYING PARASITE EVE AND JERKING OFF

[captain516]

It's situations like these that make me wish I had a Nintendo Power Glove

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

DOA IS GREAT WITH THAT CONTROLLER.

[Fathom Zero]

Or they dont want to hear some girl prattle on about some pointless BS. :rolleyes

You've just gotta find the right girl that doesn't do that. Or be immune to inane bullshit.

Preferably the former. I found a girl like that, and now I'm chasing after her like a panther to a unicorn.

Oh she is great. I wouldnt trade her for a million bucks. Totally not like George's woman.

No offense George. :\

I'm pretty sure george would've rather had your wife, too.

[stevetothepast]

these last few pages have been very amusing.

except for everything F-zero says.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

You've just gotta find the right girl that doesn't do that. Or be immune to inane bullshit.



You'd have to be in a GRAVE SITUATION to be immune.

[Fathom Zero]

these last few pages have been very amusing.

except for everything F-zero says.

Hey, I couldn't pick you out of an internet line-up, buddy.

[Fathom Zero]

OIjPwzL_5Yk

[stevetothepast]

I can't see that video where I am but I can only imagine it's HILARIOUS.

[Fathom Zero]

Well, you'd be wrong. How does it feel to be wrong?

[stevetothepast]

It's not a good feeling. Kind of like sand in your ear.

[Fathom Zero]

FEELS LIKE I DID IT BEFORE
FEELS LIKE I DID IT BEFORE
FEELS LIKE I DID IT BEFORE
FEELS LIKE I DID IT... BEFORE!

[Kitsa]

saw a little old lady in an AC/DC hoodie today. That was kind of weird-looking.

[kahljorn]

one time when i drove through pamona or some retarded city in LA we drove into a chilli's or cocos or some shit restaurant parking lot to get some food and this old lady totally accosted us for money so she could buy a "new sweater" and the weird thing was that the sweater she was already wearing was pretty nice and looked pretty trendy. I can only imagine that she wanted to trade it in for a knitted wool sweater from the goodwill that had a giant picture of Santa claus on it or some ugly pattern.

either that or buy crack from the crazy crackhead sitting in the parking lot watching her :(

[kahljorn]

ALSO IF YOU GET LEFT 4 DEAD 2 DUDE LET US KNOW :O MY XBL NAME IS SEPHONE

[Sam]

CHEATING WHORE

[kahljorn]

SHALL I SEARCH THROUGH THE "WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING NOW" THREAD FOR ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE WHO YOU"VE WRONGED ME WITH?

[Sam]

CAN'T YOU LEAVE ALL OF THAT IN THE PAST YOU ARE ALWAYS BRINGING UP OLD SHIT

[kahljorn]

JUST LIKE A WOMAN

[Sam]

JUST LIKE A FUCKING BROAD

[Fathom Zero]

This weekend sucks. This party sucked.

Life fucking sucks here. Jesus.